


If you go down in the woods today...

by 11Cleyva



Category: The Red Green Show (TV)
Genre: Homophobic Language, Internalized Homophobia, Lemon, Lime, M/M, Romantic Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-24
Updated: 2020-06-17
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:28:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 26,180
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23822347
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/11Cleyva/pseuds/11Cleyva
Summary: Ranger Gord was lonely, Winston Rothschild iii was too. But somehow everything was fixed in each other's arms. Only Winston must keep his relationship secret from certain Possum Lodge Members. Will he be able to keep his relationship secret and his friends at the same time?Ranger Gord x Winston Rothschild iii
Kudos: 8





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was supposed to be a one shot but I had more ideas for it. Later on there will be homophobic remarks but those chapters will be labeled.

"Oh geez…" a gravely voiced man spoke as he read the calendar date. He lifted his olive drab fishing hat to rub his white hair and placed it back down. His beard matched in colour unlike his suspenders of one red and one green. 

"What is it Uncle Red?" a black haired slicked comb over younger man sat on the car bumper couch leafing through a home goods magazine he brought with himself to spend the time away. 

"Harold, have you seen the calendar? It's Ranger Gord's birthday." Red spoke making Harold's eyes widen at that name. He shut the magazine placing it on the small coffee table, his mouth stayed agape. He licked his lips and turned back to face his uncle. 

"Oh…" all he could muster as he got up to be sure his older uncle didn't make any mistake. He adjusted his thick black framed glasses to focus on the date. His colour left his face when he saw the date was right. "oh." he repeated himself. 

The two men stared at each other for a moment, just giving a blank stare until another man opened the Possum Lodge door. It was Dalton Humphrey, small business owner of his late father's antique store. The man looked physically and mentally exhausted from just his teenage daughter and her stay in home boyfriend, along with his wife. 

"Congratulations Dalton, you have been selected to give a card to our friend Ranger Gord." Red smiled at the instantly confused man, who didn't even shut the door behind him before told this information. 

"Oh gee Red I'd love to but I've got something planned with Ann Marie today." he shook his head and left the lodge as quickly as he came in and quicker than being told. Red turned his attention to the taller man next to him. 

"Uncle Red, I refuse to go anywhere near Ranger Gord. Not after he drew me as a beaver and proceeded to have me attacked in all his cartoons. Why don't you just go?" Harold said as he backed away from his uncle's grasp. "You should go."

Red's expression was unchanged by anything said to him, "I can't go Harold, I have a mental restraining order for myself to avoid going to see him." He came closer to his nephew, "the man is unstable…"

Silence between them for a second then he spoke again, he heard the rumble of a diesel engine and the break giving a squeal being set in place. He knew that this man would never say no to anything. "I know! I'll volunteer the next person that comes through this door." he waited for his next volunteer victim to open the door. Almost on cue, the handle turned and opened the door. 

"Winston, congratulations you have just been selected to give this card to a friend of mine." Red said and gave a calm smile. The even more surprised man who just set one foot over the door frame just froze. Winston stood shorter than Red, and looked up slightly at the bearded man's face. Then up at Harold next to him. 

….  
Winston was the sole employee and owner of his septic business which he put his life into everyday. This wasn't apart of his business list. Getting roped into driving to the store and getting a birthday card then having to deliver said item. 

This location wasn't even in his area of where he drove. It was completely out of the town limits but he had to do this. A sense of duty was on this. He lifted his hard hat off the passenger seat, covering his short brown hair. Underneath was the envelope. 

Parking the large truck close to the base of the fire tower. He sat in his truck debating just saying he delivered it and leave now. But he couldn't on someone's birthday, but he didn't even know this Ranger Gord. He briefly saw him during Christmas but not much else. He heard the stories from Harold and Red that he was this insane lonely man living in Tower 3 for years with no interaction. And those years had caused him to think and say odd things. But Winston had a job to do. It's what Anthony Anthony would do. 

He climbed out of his truck and with card in hand climbed the 135 foot tower, he had to stop at times to rest his knees and catch his breath. But continued on to reach the top, no sound came from the small home at the end of the stairs. He never knew that water waders would heat up so fast as be climbed higher. 

"Who goes there?" a stern voice questioned as Winston poked his head through the entrance at the bottom of the floor. He saw where the question had come from, the man sitting in a small chair. 

He wore his forest ranger shirt with patches, dark green pants with brown hiking boots. But he looked worn out himself, exhausted of staring at miles and miles of tree tops. Like a frightened caged animal that had never seen a human before. The smaller man pulled himself into the tower to stand and catch his breathe. 

"Um, I'm Winston Rothschild of Roth-" 

He was cut off by the ranger getting out of his chair fast and coming to him almost in a deranged manner but his stone face turned into a large smile when he saw the card. "Did Red send you?" 

"Yeah, he was busy. So they volunteered me for it…" the uneasiness was felt in the air. He slowly gave the envelope to the man, who watched it transfixed. 

"I was getting tired of seeing Harold's face at times…" he looked back at the other man. "but I've never seen your face before." Gord squinted his eyes at the man as he tried to get a feel of him. 

"I don't normally go away from town, you know, I stay where the customers are." those dark eyes of Ranger Gord just stared at him making him feel like he was being judged. Things began to become more uncomfortable as Gord reached out to touch his face. "Oh okay…"

Gord hasn't seen this man before in all his time here, but it was nice to see someone new and somewhat attractive. To at least a lonely Ranger such as himself, this other man was the most attractive person he'd seen in a long time. Placing both hands on the small face of the other man. 

"I should be heading back now, I have septics to suck." but those hands felt hotter on his cheek. 

"Have you ever had anyone do that to you?" Gord came closer, he was much taller than Winston. In fact everyone was taller than him but this man was much taller. The overly obvious innuendo didn't sink into the man's mind as he thought of his work. 

"I don't need to, I can take care of my own septic tank myself. After all, I run my own business…" his smile trailed off as those dark eyes just stared at him more intently. Winston just stood there frozen with those warm hands touching his face. 

He'd never had anyone hold his face like this, no one had ever wanted to be near him for too long because they told him that he had an odor.

Winston just moved on his own. Standing on his tip toes for a quick kiss on Gordon's cheek he pulled back. Those eyes made him become so confident at that moment. They invited him in. Shameless, he could have not done that. It was invading other's personal spaces. Those eyes of the Ranger widened at that small peck. 

Winston knew he made a terrible mistake in his life just at that moment. He was just doing what he always wanted to do to anyone, it was just he did this to a man. But somehow he didn't feel ashamed of that fact, he mostly felt ashamed is that he didn't even know him very well. 

But that didn't matter when the taller man wrapped his arms around him and kissed him on the lips in return. Those lips were dry and cracked from hours in the elements but when it was Winston's first kiss he didn't mind either way. 

Sap. He smelt like tree sap. Like a Christmas tree, freshly cut. He was as tall as one. But he was such a good hugger. His arms warming him from the inside with each second they were around. 

To Gord, the other man was just right, those returned arms wrapped around him told him so much. That this was a man like him. Lonely. Unafraid of him. When he hugged others they ran or tried to pull away. But this little man didn't run away. He instead fell into him. 

They pulled away. To Gord this felt like all those songs he listened to about love. For once the sound of the wilderness was silent around him. His inner thoughts were extinguished, peaceful. It felt so peaceful. 

Gordon placed his hand on the cheek of the other man again. "Please don't ever leave." he spoke softly and smooth. 

… 

Red stood in the lodge looking out the window, he sent Winston over an hour and a half ago to deliver a small card and he wasn't back yet. The worry that he had sent the man to wilderness by himself began to sneak into the back of his mind. 

"Uncle Red, a watched pot never boils." Harold gave the quip to his uncle as he sat on the fur covered couch. He leafed through the issue of his magazine. 

"Yeah but something about this makes me uneasy." Red came back to the couch and sat in the small chair next to it. "You know how Gord can change on the dime. One minute he's crying and the next he's yelling about birch trees." 

He rubbed his beard and got out of the chair again to peek out the window. 

"You know, if you're so worried you can go to the fire tower and check it out for yourself. You should go, if you're worried you should go-"

"Now why would I march into the danger zone when I'm perfectly safe here?" he turned to face Harold when he heard the sound of that diesel engine. "Oh he's back." Red rushed to the door to meet the late man. 

Winston came in with a larger than normal grin on his face. He didn't say anything but came to sit down in the chair next to Harold. Red noticed a few things off with him, his bow tie was crooked and he was more wrinkled in the shirt. 

"Did you, ah, deliver the card?" Red asked after a moment of silence. 

"I sure did." Winston chirped as he gave a larger smile. "And you know what, I'm going to see him later this week…"

"What?!" Harold closed his magazine in surprise. He never heard anyone say they wanted to meet Ranger Gord more than once. Red stood behind the chair and looked down at the man in it. He could tell that something wasn't right. But he didn't have all the cards in the deck to draw a good conclusion.


	2. Chapter 2

The two walked along the hiking trail not saying much but for both men it was nice to finally have someone who didn't run away. Gord held a rolled up towel under his arm and the small basket of food. Mostly his canned goods from the tower, but enough for a small lunch.   
The much shorter man smiled as he just walked silently along. It was so much more peaceful in the forest than in the small Possum lodge area. Less garbage and less of just anything that'd take his thoughts away from Gord. 

He had to admit to himself of the fact they hadn't spoken much about themselves to each other but the relationship was just starting. Though he'd never been in one he didn't know how they went exactly, his own father and mother didn't have anything of a relationship. His father was drunk most the time, his mother never seemed to come home like she used to. Winston knew what it felt like to be neglected, but now he felt like he was happier than ever. 

Gord felt the same way, having a companion to walk these trials, hearing the same sounds he did in the forest. Sharing his time with another made a constant smile to his lips. If only others could see how happy he could be. Being a forest ranger meant he had the responsibility to keep others safe but now he really had to be diligent to keep this miracle to be safe. 

The taller man stopped abruptly, adjusting his belt and staring out at the small stream of water. Nothing was said as he unfurled the flannel blanket, placing the hand woven basket down. A dirt bank gave way to the view of the stream with more trees across the way. Gord sat onto the cloth first reaching a hand up to help the smaller one sit. 

"So… What do you think?" the man asked, gaining a look of confusion back. "I mean think of the trees, nature...air." 

The awkwardness of the much larger man gave him a sense of ease, that he wasn't the only one that felt this way. "Oh well, I like it all." Winston gave a smile again as he looked off into the green forest. 

"Why do you smile so much?" Gord changed his thoughts on the man suddenly, making him drop his smile. "I don't mean it in a bad way. It's just, I smile when I'm happy at something but you seem to smile all the time."

It took a minute or two for the man to actually think. He was never asked why he did this. He never smiled as a boy growing up. Then he came to the decision to either tell the truth or take the short answer of lying. Winston pondered it for a moment and finally made his decision. 

"I smile because it makes me feel happy and that makes me feel better about myself." he answered bluntly. "I know you didn't ask this, but I grew up in a bad situation. My dad wasn't the best and it came off on me. I was always depressed and angry, then I found these books. They really helped me get through it all. They told me, ``If I think positive I'll be positive." Winston heaved a heavy sigh and laid back on the blanket, enjoying the mid spring breeze that rustled the trees. 

The other man looked at him for a moment thinking about what was said. "Do you think those books could help me? With my loneliness."

"Gord, a book won't help you with loneliness. I can." Winston turned his head to the side making the hard helmet roll off his head. The ranger gave a smile at the answer and leaned over to give a kiss. They both laughed at it and went in for another one. Followed by another until Gord hovered over the smaller man under and looked down into his eyes. And lowered himself gently to give kisses again. Both men forgot about the lunch when they had so much craving for each other. 

Rothschild wrapped his arms around the neck of the man and brought him in for a deeper than normal kiss. The sound of panting from the passion they shared became louder as Gord left a dark red mark on the throat of his now claimed lover. 

The man stopped when he heard the sound of feet coming close to them. He looked up from the dazed eyes of Winston and saw Red walking down the trail. His stomach sank but his annoyance grew, just when he was buried in the neck of his companion someone came to break it apart.

"Hey you two. I just came to this neck of the woods and I find you necking it in the woods." Red tried to cover his embarrassment and his uncomfortable feelings. The ranger pulled himself onto his feet as the one under was left scrambling. 

"Gord, I was just checking in on you, it's Friday, normally I come by." Red moved closer and picked the helmet off the ground and gave it to Winston. "But I see everything is going good here. See you back at the lodge Winston." as he walked away slowly only to pick up speed. 

…...

Opening the door and slamming it as quick as he could. "Harold, you're never going to guess what I saw when I went into the woods today." Red was acting frantic as he came to his Nephew who continued to sit. 

"A teddy's bear picnic?" Harold laughed at his own joke but at the sight of his uncle not laughing stopped. 

"No. I saw Ranger Gord and Winston…" he stopped to gesture with his hands. 

"Picking mushrooms?" 

"Making out!" 

"Awwww that's so nice. You know it's great to hear." he smiled and stood to be taller than his uncle. 

"Did you not hear me? I said making out."

"Yes and I said that's great to hear," Harold eyed his uncle's uncomfortable movements as he paced the room. "All I'm saying is, it's natural for two people who like each to do that, Uncle Red."

"Harold...two men?"

"Well what do you want me to do? I'm not going to be the one to ruin this. I say let it go, it's not harming anyone."

"But if word gets out that Winston has the hots for men it'll be a different story."

"Who has the hots for men?" Dalton came in through the door missing half the conversation by a second. Both men looked wide eyed at each other. Dalton wasn't the man to mention anything out of the ordinary to. His strict religious beliefs were known around the lodge. 

"This person we know." Red spoke quickly and bit the inside of his cheek. Dalton gave a nod and pulled a folded paper from his pocket. He honestly had no care for anything they said after all these years. 

"Listen Red, my store is going to have a sale. Well, not much of a sale but I just want to get the useless crap out of my face." he folded his arms as the two Greens read the message. "Give it to Winston when you see him."

"I haven't seen him!" Red shouted at the mention of the name. 

"When you do, give it to him…Oh. I think I hear him parking outside. I'll give it to him." Dalton ripped the slip from their hands and stood by the door. He waited impatiently as the wooden door opened. 

Red turned away from the door to stare at his nephew who glared at him almost just waiting for this man to ruin the lives of others. The door opened and shut behind him as he heard the oversized rubber boots come closer to him. He needed to act normal but normal was hard after what he saw. 

"That's quite a mark you got there." Red tried to not say anything but it was it in his face. He got an embarrassed cough from the shorter man as he tried to pull the buttoned collar up to hide it. 

"Yeah, look I'm sorry you had to find out that way. One thing led to another," Winston tried to avert his gaze from anyone in the room. He felt like a fool, "I don't want this to get out, please."

Harold made a small noise and looked at his uncle waiting for the answer. Winston didn't feel like he was in danger with Harold telling anyone but it was the Possum Lodge leader that could make the difference. They had one gay man in the lodge, but he wasn't on the head counsel. Red took a step back and sat on the fur covered chair next to the furnace and rubbed his beard. The five foot six man followed behind taking a seat across the leader's chair. 

"Alright, Winston. I will keep it a secret so long as it doesn't get around. I don't want the others to get uncomfortable." Red finally spoke, the septic owner scrunched his brow and stood up. 

"Uncomfortable? What's so bad about what I do in the privacy of my life? We're all men, we have that in common. We are allowed to love, and now I have that in common too. I know what should be said in public and what shouldn't." he started to walk away to the door, stopping to turn around,"I'm proud, not loud." with that he opened the door and walked out. 

Silence filled the room as the younger man came to sit down. Red knew he may have said something to make Winston feel bad, he didn't mean to. It was just not something he was good at talking about. He didn't know how to walk around topics like this, not many people talked about it. He felt he messed up saying what he wanted to get across.


	3. Chapter 3

"A picnic, a real picnic with food? Not acorns?" Gord dropped his binoculars from scanning the tree tops to gaze at the man sitting in the wooden green chair behind him. 

"Yep, food and beer. It's the Possum Lake May picnic. Its bring a friend," Winston got up the seat to stand next to Gord, who smiled as he bit his lower lip. The excitement of eating real food made his mouth water. "Plus I'd say we're more than friends at this point."

The taller man dropped the pair of binoculars and wrapped his arms around the shorter man bringing him into a strong hug. He placed his head onto the hair of the other man and smiled. He could stay like this forever with this man. He felt those arms grip his back to hold him just as much. 

"Gord you have to promise me something…" Winston looked up at the man holding him, "Try not to be too obvious. I don't want word to get out to the Lodge Members." his voice trailed off as he went back to place his ear next to the chest of the other's. 

"I promise. I'll kiss on it." Gord found his way to the other man and kissed him softly. "I'll run to the store to get something to bring to the picnic."

….. 

"Red, Gord will be coming to the picnic. He's super excited." Winston smiled as the flannel clad man sat at this heavy wooden desk fixing a fly for fishing. Red took a moment to let those words sink in as his expression changed from focused to concern. 

"He won't be bringing any forest goodies will he?" he turned to face the man who came into the room. The shaking of a no gave him relief. 

"No and I told him to try not to make it obvious we're, you know, a thing." Winston lowered his voice to avoid anyone hearing him. A few of the members stayed after the meeting to talk or just avoid going home to their wives. 

"Winston, are you okay with hiding this?" Red asked quietly. He watched as the other man came to sit on the small stool he brought closer to the desk. 

"Well, to be honest. It's hard. See, I want to be like you guys, you know, because I understand now these relationships. But then I'm not like you guys…"

"You're still like us. You just like things a little different than the rest of us. And there is nothing wrong with that." Red was finally able to make himself feel better since the last they spoke. He came off without an understanding of the situation but given a few days to think it over he came to terms." And I'm sorry for making you feel like you're not."

As Winston was about to speak again, the door opened up and Dalton came in. He seemed flustered, both men in the room began to worry he may have overheard. 

"You're never going to believe what I heard, " he started as he shut the door behind him. "Ranger gord is dating a man!  
He came into town for fresh fruits earlier today and told me it's for a special occasion. I asked who the lady was. He said not a lady. So I asked if a log or bear, you know. And he said 'a he' . I tell ya, I got out of there fast. No sir will I stand next to a homosexual." Dalton spouted making Winston start to stand up and head for the door. 

" Oh Winston, can you come by the store this week and help me out. I have a sinking suspicion my store toilets will back up. Moose came by and left more than just money in the store, if you catch my drift."

"Sure,I'd be glad to. I'll try to make it over after the picnic tomorrow." he said and slipped out the door before anything else was said. 

"Fast little thing isn't he?" Dalton said as he stood by the desk. "Can you believe that? Another member gay. It's spreading like a disease. Once one man is gay they all start."

"Ranger Gord has been living in a tree for the past 18 years." Red spoke and leaned back in his duct taped chair looking exasperated, he was getting tired of hearing the same thing after a while. It was none of his business of what people in the lodge did on their own time. 

"Yes but he's a member of the lodge also," Dalton made his way to the door, "I just hope this doesn't ruin the picnic. Ants, bees and homosexuals can ruin an event."

"Yes, because a gay man will land on your ice-cream Dalton." Red said as the man left the door and shook his head at the words he kept hearing. He just wanted it to be left alone and have a good time at the picnic the next day. 

…. 

The sun was peeking around the clouds at times, the breeze blew the petals off the trees as the small town had roped off the main square of Possum Lake for the large picnic. The town itself had very little locals but each organization had its own sections to raise money for their clubs. The lodge had its own section next to the lakeshore. 

The town council thought it best if the Possum Lodge was set further away from the eyes of the town folk and the Caribou Lodge closer to the main square. Favourites at play but the head members didn't mind, gave them more time to sit and just eat the potluck of food the wives all cooked. 

Dalton had escaped his own wife to be with the fellas at the lodge area. She had left to see the crafting booths of the Caribou Lodge wives. The store owner found an empty lawn chair next to Red who sat holding a can of beer in hand. 

"Gee, I wish Mike could have been out of jail to see this." Dalton spoke between his sips of the cold beer. 

"I'm sure he misses this too. He'll be out eventually but next time maybe he won't be stealing a cop car with another criminal in the back." Red swatted a fly from his face as he looked at the lake. It's green clumps of what used to be moss skimmed the top of the water in the breeze. 

His attention slowly turned to the side of the lake at the wooden table, the two that sat there next to each other. Winston and Gord. Red wished Dalton won't see them but it was unavoidable that he will. Red watched as the two just ate and spoke to one another. The occasional laugh was shared, he could see the restraint being shown. They way they would start to move towards each other then quickly away once they realize that they are in front of the others. 

"Red look. It's Gord." Dalton finally noticed him and pointed with the can in hand. "I can't believe Winston would sit next to him…" the sound of the words just oozed from his mouth. 

"People are people, Dalton." Red just looked at the lake wanting to just fish and get away from the noise. "Don't bother him. You know Gord. He's unstable at times. He's like a table with one short leg. He could tip at any moment."

"I guess. I gotta have another beer." he got out of the lawn chair to fetch a new can but gave looks as he walked away. 

The two men sat close to one another, trying to get the farthest table away from the crowds but the space was not big enough. Later they would just walk around the area together hoping to dodge judgment. Gord couldn't help but to keep his eyes on the man next to him. He hardly touched his food but tried to seem interested in the event too. 

The years of eating canned goods rendered his tastes only for creamed corn. But the smoke from the BBQ did make him want to eat the burgers served. "It's good to smell a good BBQ. It's been a long time since I have."

"I can't smell it." Winston spoke between eating. Gord hunched his shoulders to be eye level at the table. 

"You can't smell the smoke?" 

The man next to him finished the food in his mouth, "I've never been able to smell. I get it from my old man. I can't even tell if I smell." 

Gord couldn't help but to lean in close and make a sensual move to pick up the scent of the man next to him. Red across the way saw this and shook his head again. Gord doesn't listen at times when told don't do something. But thankfully he pulled away and smiled. 

"You smell like heavy detergent and something more. I think it's just you that smells good." he spoke softly and lowered his right hand to be under the table. He gave a squeeze to the thigh of the man. Red rolled his eyes at seeing this. He was beginning to get tired of the way this was playing out, he needed to step in and cool those jets of the ranger. 

Sitting in the chair caused his old body to find it difficult to get out but he finally strolled his way over. He sat on the opposite side of the table to hide the touchy hands of Gord. He could tell by the embarrassment on the face of the septic cleaner that he came in at the right time. 

"So Gord, how do you like it being out of that tower?" Red asked to get the rangers attention away from Winston. 

"I don't mind it. I just don't like the music, what ever happened to the good songs? It's all these strange sounds instead of words. The town hasn't changed much either, just gotten dirtier." Gord said placing both hands on the colding burger on the plate. He didn't like being interrupted but Red Green always bothered him at times.

"Got any plans for the picnic?" Red turned his attention to Winston, who shrugged his shoulders. 

"We may walk around a bit. Then I have to take Gord back and get to Dalton's store to fix the issue there." he sounded enthusiastic about being with Gord more than doing his job. This sounded odd to Red as he knew Winston loved his work more than anything. 

"Then I'll let you get to it." Red stood up from the wooden table. "Remember." he said as he went back to his lawn chair. Gord finally finished his food and the two left the table to walk around. 

The six foot two man followed closely, towering over the other as they cut across the crowds. He tried in thick crowds to grab the hand of Winston's, he succeeded in catching it. Making him turn around as fast as it was grabbed. He cricked his neck up to look at that glorious smile of the ranger and gave his own smile back. Unaware that Dalton was close in the crowds to them as they continued to walk holding hands the best they could. Their height difference of eight inches made it a new experience but not difficult. 

Keeping a grip of each other's hand made it easier for them to get through the crowds. But the heat of May made their palms slick, breaking their embrace. At the moment the picnic was a nice distraction but they didn't pay attention to any of it. Much too focused on each other.

Gord was thankful for the kindness that Winston had given him. The man didn't try to leave but instead got closer to him. He felt much more comfortable to be himself, he showed he was funny and compassionate. The sides he had forgotten about from being trapped in the tower for all those years. The real Gord he was before being left alone in the wilderness with only his 8-track tapes and guitar. 

Winston was for the first time enjoying himself outside of working. Being able to talk about more than just his work, which people have come to expect from him. He was a human being just like them with feelings and emotions all his own. And he could finally share them with Gord. 

They stopped by the shore of Possum Lake on Gordon's request. He remembered coming to the lake as a boy and just taking in the view of nature. It was another reason he became devoted to helping preserve nature the best he can. He grabbed the small hand of Winston, interlocking his fingers with his. 

He didn't want this moment to slip away. It was perfect. But he knew he had to return to the emptiness of the tower soon. And this day would just be a memory in his mind. But at least he would be able to say in the end he was able to make a memorable day with someone he loved.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains sexual content.

Gord liked the drive back to the tower in the large septic tanker. But he loved that this had been the best two week of his life, but he couldn't tell if the other man did too. He smiled all the time, so the chance he was enjoying it was hard to tell. But they made the climb up the tower stairs anyway, nothing said between them. Something Gord worried about, he'd lose the one person that made his days worth living. 

"This may sound strange, but allow me to ask…" Gord broke the sounds of the crickets around them. He watched as the smaller man sat in the wooden chair once they reached the cab, removing his helmet. His brown eyes never left the man before him. "Have you ever been serious with anyone?" 

"Of course I'm serious." 

"No no no, I mean serious in a relationship kind of way."

"Oh… I did date an aromatherapist but that didn't last an hour." he placed it on the ground revealing his short brown hair. "You know, you're the first one to not run away from me." he smiled and leaned back in the seat. 

Gord gave a heavy blink, the other man didn't pick up his meaning. "No… Look I'll get to the point. Winston have you ever had sex?" 

Then silence. A confused look came over him as he searched the man over for a moment. Gord could see the way his breathing had changed in his chest. The man gave a lick to his lips. "No. I practice abstinence." 

"You choose to not do anything?" Gord was genuinely puzzled. All his time in the tower had rendered him seeking affection, but here was a man who chose to not have affections. 

"Well yeah. It's not like I can just openly discuss my feelings with the others. Plus I'm not the same as them. I like men. I tell ya, if they found out I'd be a dead duck." Rothschild watched as Gord came to take the seat next to him. "and I also wanted to wait to do anything with someone I loved." 

"You love me?" 

"Well, yeah Gord. I think about you all the time. I see you as much as I can. I haven't loved something so much as I do with my work, and that's saying something." he placed a hand on the knee of the other. "I mean, this is all new to me."

Gord couldn't help but to show his emotions. He knew that he couldn't stop himself from crying and hearing he was finally loved made his heart explode with relief. He grabbed the other man and pulled him into his bear hug squeezing him tight. He loved the smell of Winston. His clothes still had a smell of detergent. People saying he smelt must be a mistake. His breathing caught in the ear of the other. 

Gord took the moment, "Would it be possible if I were to, say… pleasure you?" he whispered in his ear. Pulling away he looked into those wide eyes, so quietly staring back to him. "And if you feel uncomfortable anytime I can stop. Deal?" It was all so quick but after a day of holding hands and enjoying themselves, Winston had no doubts at this moment. 

Just a nod is all he got in response as he cracked a smile on his lips. He waited so long to touch this man in ways that he'd only imagined. Gord hungrily kissed the neck of him, bringing a small squeak out of Winston. Getting him to stand, he led the path to the makeshift bed. 

The two just laid down in the sheets and went back to kissing feverishly. Gord was amazed at the tenacity of the smaller man, Winston was the first one to kiss back and command control over the Ranger's mouth. Rothschild entered his mouth with his tongue, it was just like he had thought it would be. Different at first but it made him feel things he hadn't before. Strange things from all over his body. Gord returned the favour by rubbing his knuckles over the chest of the other. 

It made him end the probing kiss and shut his eyes finally. Letting Gord gain the upper hand, "Are you sure you abstained in your life? You seem awfully excited…" he teased at the man who was now undoing the bowtie and buttons of his shirt. He got a snort in return and felt the man who now turned to face him on the bed begin to move closer to him. 

His body seeking contact with him. Gordon slipped the suspenders off the small shoulders of this man and pulled them down just enough. He let him get close to his body, hearing a quiet low moan at the contact. Those light brown eyes opened, dazed in the sensations. But those hands trembled as they skillfully opened each button on the green ranger shirt.

Gord seized the moment by removing the article from his body, allowing Winston to look at him. The celibate man was no longer thinking about celibacy as he nipped at the collar bone and left marks. Gord went back to teasing the chest of the man, feeling the hardness of his chest and the overwhelming feeling of something more serious in those hip waders.

"Are you still comfortable with me going to touch you?" the Ranger asked, getting a yeah as his reply, he set out touching through the material of those thick pants. He never heard those noises as he felt the bulge, he had his own but he had pleasured himself many times already to this man without him there in the past two weeks. He could wait a little longer. 

The heavy breathing of the septic owner told Gord that it was feeling good. Feeling this for the first time made Winston unhitch from his composed nature, gritting and giving small bites to the skin of the Ranger who now found a good spot to touch. The rubberized waders hindered the true sensation as Gord left the arousal and began to slip his hands down the pants to start to tug them off. Winston helped remove the rubber waders by kicking the muck boots off, his trousers were thrown off by the ranger whose smile was giving Winston warmth in seeing it. 

Gord brushed the short hair of the man in his arms, giving a small touch to his face. He didn't want to lose this moment for anything. But his attention returned to the growing hotness that now tried to seek contact with his leg. The Ranger couldn't help but see the expression of the man close to his body causing him to hungrily kiss the now exposed neck. 

Neither man knew who was dominating the situation, each was jockeying for the upper hand until the taller man took the first step of cupping the lower extremity in his hot hand. 

The loose fitting boxers gave room for Gord to find his way around. Through the thin cloth the hand could be felt teasing and playing, both men just stared into each other's eyes. Gord with a smirk on his lips and Winston with a plead for more on his. He gave him a kiss on those lips, and Gordon ended the kiss and feverishly kissed his neck, he left saliva on his skin. 

He always imagined he'd be doing this one day, he had this played out time and again in his mind but never who he'd be doing it to. Until he saw him. This small meek man, whose voice was high but he had all the features of the perfect person to Gord. 

He pulled away as the shorter man looked at him with visible confusion but his eyes were clouded with that dreamy gleam. Gord wanted to see what he was working with as he went to grab the waistband of those briefs that did a job holding back the hardening bulge. 

"What are you doing?" Winston placed a hand on the shoulder of Gord. The ranger gave him a smile and spoke. 

"I'm going to show you how much I love you." Gordon could have kicked himself for that cliché remark but it seemed to have done the trick in easing the other man's worries. But Winston's hand clenched his shoulder as he brought down the boxers. 

This was the first time he'd ever been exposed to anyone but his doctor. The cool wind sent a tingling through his body as he lay there with his dick hard and another man looking at it. Gord just stared at it, he was marveling at it. 

It was average in size but the exposed head called to Gord as he gently gave a pump to its hot smooth flesh. A small sound came from Winston as he felt this new sensation come over him. His breathing quickly began to speed up as long as the touching continued. Moving the skin back over the head and down again, the friction made the shorter man pant uncontrollably. 

Winston was not a quiet man when it came to this. He gave out ragged breathing and curses as he felt the hand over his most private area. But he tried his best to keep the business man composer he gave everyone in the Possum Lake area. 

He just delivered a birthday card but ended up getting a gift of his own weeks later. He was glad he was volunteered to be the one, he didn't want this feeling to end. This up hill climb of enjoyment. He leaned against the bedding, both hands now clasping the sheets to calm his slowly bucking hips at these sensations. This was all new for him as he white knuckled the sheets. 

Gord kept this speed as he enjoyed the sounds from his romantic friend. He didn't know if he should call him his boyfriend or not. But he felt they were already on that level with each other. He kept his eyes on the man in his arms, squirming around. 

Something inside Winston began to change, that up hill climb became a need now. He felt this feeling he never had in his whole life before, this urge to end it. His hips rocked at times with the pumps but now they began to buck. Winston's whole body began to cramp in places it never did before, his need to end was increasing as he felt this filling in his body. 

He tried to open his eyes and looked at Gordon but he couldn't as he pressed the back of his head against the pillow and braced himself. He never made so many sounds as he did now. The speeding friction of that larger hand wrapped around him caused it to be the tipping point. He forced his hips forward as he felt that filling sensation leave his body. Hot shooting with each spurt he released. Gord watched as it covered his fingers with the slowed pumps. 

He eased down after he felt it was done. Breathing hard and dazed. His mouth and throat dry from being open the whole time. His first experience was amazing, he gave a small laugh. 

His eyes opened to see a smiling Gordon, those eyes of that perfect man. They kissed again to seal the event, they became more in love with each other than ever before. Each one found they needed the other to complete the entirety of their lives. 

……. 

The next morning, Red climbed the stairs to the fire tower until he reached the top. His eyes went to the chair Gord would always sit in but he was not there. Scanning the messy small ten by ten room he glanced upon the large cot. Red rolled his eyes and he knew that he was in for trouble with this. 

He felt like a parent to all the lodge members and he just found out that this one was messing around with the Park Ranger. He lightly stepped into the awning covered room and came close to the pile of blankets. And sure enough there were the two. 

Winston clutching to the flannel blanket as Gord slept holding the much smaller one. It was almost too much for the old man to handle and yet he was somewhat relieved to find these two worked in an odd way. He didn't want to break this up and Red thought to himself that he won't. 

"Red Green?" the whisper of Gord broke the silence as he tried to climb down the ladder to the stairs. The half dressed ranger slid out the thick blankets leaving the other waking up confused. 

Red didn't feel as comfortable now seeing a shirtless and covered in hickeys Gord standing before him and a partially dressed septic owner in bed. The mistake of showing up made it worse, he knew he should have just kept trying to call Winston's phone instead of checking in. But he got uneasy when he didn't answer the phone. 

"Hey Ranger Gord… Just checking in to see if Winston is still here," Red gave a fast peek to the bed and back at Gordon."Oh there he is. Hi Winston." 

No answer from the waking up man, who pulled on the sleeved button up shirt over his undershirt. Just a long stare from Gord. The nervous smile left Red's face as Gord continued to glare. 

"Yes he's still here. He was just leaving too." 

"Don't get angry at him just because I showed up… Did you two just get done-" 

"We did last night." Gord spoke cold. 

"Oh okay, I'm glad I didn't interfere. But I also wish I hadn't heard that you did.

"It wasn't that, Red. I just bopped his bologna." 

A long pause before Red spoke, "Again I wish I hadn't heard that you did."

"Hey Red." Winston finally said as he stayed covered from the waist down. His clothes seemed to have exploded all over the room the night before. He could see his boxers across the cab and one boot next to the bed and the other behind the two men. Gord came back to the sheets and wrapped his arms around the man. He was beginning to get defensive about this man, for once he had the greatest thing in his life and he didn't want anything to take it away. 

"You know Winston, Dalton's been calling you since after you left the picnic. You said you'd drop by the store for a septic check."

"Oh shoot! I completely forgot. That's not like me…" the man began to get down on himself. He made his life about his job but he was starting to lose track of his work orders. He felt Gord rub his shoulders, it stirred his insides but didn't calm his mind. "Red, try to stall and I'll get to Dalton's right away. Tell him I wasn't feeling so good after the food. You know, gallbladder removal and all that."

"I'll try, but he may not listen to me." Green started for the exit, "I'll see ya, Gord." he received a wave back as the Ranger followed to help collect the clothes that had scattered. 

He could see the change in expression on the face of the other man. It was different to not see the man smile, instead it was blank. He watched as the man put on the lower half of the outfit and stood to place the muck boots on. 

"Listen Gord, I'm sorry I have to leave so soon. I have a job to take care of today." He came closer to the man and placed his hands on the arms of his love. He was sincere in his words. "I'll be back later on tonight."

"Great! I mean good…" the ranger didn't want to let go but he could feel he needed to. Winston did have a job to do, but he couldn't help but to start to have tears form in his eyes. He knew the man was looking at him but he didn't expect the shorter one to pull him down into a kiss. It was so passionately unexpected, it made Gord feel like melting butter. He felt that tongue slip into his mouth again and against his own. This no longer celibate man was hungry for more but he pulled away after a few seconds. His smile came back as he started to walk to the exit. 

Red watched from his van and shook his head. He knew that he had made a mistake in letting these two find each other. But then he couldn't have asked for a better couple. He started the ignition and drove back to town.


	5. Chapter 5

Spotting Dalton's store wasn't as hard as it seemed. The store was just once an old house turned into a store through his father who gave it to him in passing. Dalton was what could have been called an entrepreneur, but that'd be a lie. Dalton didn't start his own business for the risk of doing business, he gained it from his dad but took it to make money. If there was one thing he loved it was cash, only he couldn't keep it long enough to spend it on himself. He was shrewd, greedy and living in a dead end marriage with nothing to show for it besides a daughter who rebelled against him. 

Tabitha had lived in his home all her life and brought in her boyfriend who also lived in the home. Making Dalton's life more miserable than ever which he found great joy sharing that misery with the other men at the lodge. 

Behind the small storefront was a pile of garbage to most of the locals but to him it was his gold mine. He'd up his prices for everything even if they didn't work or he broke them himself to make it seem an antique. Either way anyone could put it Dalton Humphrey was more a criminal than Mike Hamar ever was. But it was a job on Winston's list, a septic was a septic no matter who owned it. 

The large red truck pulled off the street and into the dirt parking on the side of the building. He woke up just an hour ago, sleep still clung to his mind as he rubbed his eyes. Winston had a whirlwind of a day and had to get his head back in the game. 

He hopped out of the tanker and came inside. Crowded with junk and garbage with only enough room for someone his size to squeeze by. "Dalton?" he spoke up as he reached the counter. The sound of rustling told him he wasn't alone and sure enough the other man approached the counter. 

"There you are," Dalton stood taller than the septic cleaner and put his hands on his hips. "you know I've been trying to get a hold of you since yesterday."

"I know, I just wasn't feeling the greatest after the picnic." Winston answered, hoping it was a good enough lie. It seemed to have worked because he got a sympathy nod from the frizzy haired owner. 

"Fair enough. Just get the job done. I'm scared to even know what will happen if it gets flushed again." he said and pointed to the small wooden door. He came to sit in the chair that looked like it and around since the founding of the lake. 

Winston came into the room. He wasn't even a plumber, he was a sewage cleaner. But a job was a job no matter what. He flicked the light on shutting the door, the small mirror behind the sink showed his face and how tired he still looked. His eyes burned, he was used to getting up early but not used to the strenuous activity the night before. It took its toll on him as he turned the sink on to splash water on his face. He needed to get home after this and change and get a shave. He never liked to get too disheveled in the public eye. 

The water turned hotter the longer he left it running, he gave himself a shock when he placed his hands under the faucet. The man had forgotten a lot of things in the morning; eating, shaving and having to relieve himself. He was going to have to flush the toilet to test to see if it would take more in the tank, he might as well use this to his advantage. 

Outside the closed door, Dalton was more confused at the sounds of the sink running and now the sound of urination. The owner was having a hard time of believing Winston was telling the truth. It was taking longer than normal for him to get the job done. Normally he'd check the toilet then rush out to get the septic tank drained. But today he was taking his time. The sound of the toilet finally flushed and sink water again, Dalton went back to trying to look indifferent. 

"Yeah the pull of the toilet tells me that it's not going to hold much more. Have you been putting more than just the normal things down the drain?" Winston asked as he headed towards the door. 

"The occasional paper towel but that's normal." 

How many times did he hear that one? And how many times did he have to tell them not to do that. But he nodded and went outside to get his oversized leather gloves on. He unwrapped the large hose and dragged it to the pipe in the ground. 

Carefully he opened the lid to the septic and dipped the tube into the ground. Giving it enough slack he walked back to his truck and flipped it on. The hum of the vacuum told him it was working. He was growing tired again, but continued to walk back to the hose. Only a slight odor could be detected but it wasn't anything bad. 

Winston thought about how whenever anyone would get near him or his truck they'd act as if they hit a wall. He knew that he was different from them at the get go. Aware of the fact he couldn't smell scent like everyone else. But it gave him relief to know that to Gord, the most wonderful man in his life, he didn't have a stench. And he could smell just a little bit of Gord, or at least what he imagined he would smell like. Pine. If there was a smell he could try to pin down on him it'd be pine. Whenever it was Christmas time and he would help cut a tree for the lodge and the sap would get on his gloves. Soaking in the leather and seeping into his mind. The soft aroma could be found if he shut his eyes and focused as hard as he could he'd smell it. And it was a wonderful experience to have a real smell he could have. 

Winston smiled to himself as he thought of how Gord loved him and what Gord did for him the night before. The way he was touched, never in his dreams did he think that'd happen. Those hands that so diligently stroked him and brought him to the clouds. 

Dalton stared out his window at the man who was daydreaming. Something was off but he couldn't figure it out. Then the thought of Gord sitting next to him at the picnic came back. It was the gay ranger that did something, he knew it. It was a disease. He'd have to save Winston for its grip. But he'd do that when the stink went away. 

The vacuuming went for almost an hour and some added time as he closed the lid to the pipe and grabbed the bag of septic yeast to finish the job. He knew how people didn't want to stand next to him after the job so he knocked on the door to deliver the bag. 

"Done already?" The mood had changed in Dalton's tone as he opened the door. He took the bag and passed the already made out check. "Hey Winston got a minute?" 

"I suppose." he answered and held the check in his ungloved hand. 

"You sat next to Ranger Gord yesterday huh?" 

"I suppose I did." he didn't know what this had to do with anything. He was here for a system cleaning not this. 

"Don't you know he's a homosexual?" 

"I suppose I do." he didn't feel like talking about this. He didn't like the sound of the word. 

"How are you comfortable sitting next to him? Don't you know he'd attack you at any moment." Dalton was serious in his words. "Gay men are prone to go after all men."

"Who told you that, Dalton?" he didn't want to laugh. 

"Ann Marie." he crossed his arms at the shorter man. 

"Well do you know any gay men?" Winston asked as he leaned in the door frame. He watched as Dalton searched for an answer. 

"Not one and I'm glad there's none of those kinds of people around here," he leaned in closer to Winston, "You know the gays."

"Dalton, what if there was?" his heart began to speed up, the way Dalton made it sound it was like being yourself was a bad thing. It made him feel angered inside but instead kept that smile on his lips. 

"Harold isn't here anymore now that he works in the city. Besides I wouldn't have anyone like that around me." Dalton puffed his chest out at the pride he had for being away from all that. 

"Dalton… You do know someone," Winston stood straight and tried to be taller than he was for a moment. "because I am." he could have kept it hidden a little while longer couldn't he? But it felt like a ton taken off his body with those simple words. 

Dalton's expression changed from several different faces. More of just confusion set in. He squinted his eyes and came closer. "Excuse me?" his voice was scarier somehow now. More intense and no longer felt like himself. 

Winston shrunk in his height, and felt his body tremble. He had made a terrible mistake just now but he couldn't take it back even if he tried. "I said… I-I'm," he blinked his eyes rapidly as Dalton leaned down to try to be at face level with him. "gay."

Silence. Just silence. The only sound was the occasional car passing on the road. Winston wanted to bolt to his tanker but where would he go? He was here in Possum Lake. He couldn't go back to his family home 70 miles away. He couldn't go to the lodge. 

"Get out of my store." those words came with such a cold feeling behind them. Winston gave a quick nod and began to leave. Dalton stood out his store as he watched the man quicken his pace to the truck. "You're not allowed to my store again! You hear me?!" he shouted as the tanker started and began to back out. 

Winston could feel every emotion he had pushed down in his mind beginning to break out. The hidden sadness, anger, fear, regret, all of which he tried to mask behind his smile it all started to emerge. He felt like he had a clog in his system of shame blocking everything. He wanted to drive home but he was just experiencing too much to make it home. He had to pull off to the side of the road. 

He threw the other glove off his hand and killed the motor, and just sat. Staring forward. He had nothing to think about but somehow he was. Winston hated to show emotions but he couldn't stop it now. He just kept silent as his eyes welled up. 

He cried, the tears just dropped from his eyes without a sound. They made a small patter as they hit the rubber waders one after another. His smile was gone and his true emotion was shown. 

Winston was in all reality depressed. He knew he had a great job he loved. He had enough money. But he didn't have all the love he needed. His life growing up was hard having to spend time covering for his father from the police. His father wasn't the same after being fired from the railroad. 

His home was filled with yelling, drunkenness and neglect. If he smiled the world would smile with him. But it seemed the world smiled without him regardless. He was just faking it, faking his interest in women to please the world. Faking all the happiness. 

And for once, being true to himself he found happiness. He was true to himself about his love for Gord. He wiped his tears away with his sleeve and coughed to straighten himself out. 

He'd go home, get cleaned up and just forget the world in the arms of Gord one more time before he had to face it. 

…. 

"Red, it's me, uh Winston. I may have done something stupid. I, uh, I told Dalton about the thing I wasn't supposed to mention. And well, he's not in the best of moods. So I'm going to stay with Gord for a day or so. I was, uh, hoping you could help me out here, eh? With Dalton I mean. Thanks." The call ended on the cassette recorder as Red listened to it for the second time over. If anyone was as pea-brained to tell something they shouldn't to someone they shouldn't, it'd be those two. The older man thought to himself as he rewound the tape back. He gazed over at the clock that was held together with duct tape, going on 4. Dalton should be getting off work any moment and Red knew the place he'd come to the Possum Lodge. 

So Red waited. He didn't have Harold on this to give any good advice but then what advice was there to give. A big 'I told you not to do it' would suffice to the bothersome duo but to Dalton he didn't have a clue. 

The sound of the main door shutting and the thud of heavy feet told the Lodge leader here was trouble. He braced for the door to be swung off the duct taped together hinges, but instead it opened slowly. 

Dalton came through the door and closed it. Strangely quiet he stood away from the desk covered in tape rolls. 

"Can I help you, Walton?" 

"Walton?"

"Dalton. Sorry I had something else on the- what did you need?" He spoke as soft as he could with his gravelly voice. The fatter man came to stand in front of the desk. 

"You knew Ranger God's status. But why didn't you know Winston's?" Dalton asked, eerily calm. 

"Because at the time, he was single. And why does it matter to who he's with?" 

"Because at the possum lodge we are men." he began to raise his voice. 

"He is a man. Being anything doesn't change a thing. That's the kind of narrow mindedness that makes him not feel comfortable." Red could have wished that Harold would have heard that wit. 

"Look, I have spent years being friends with Winston. And this news comes out." Dalton hunched over the desk placed but hands down on the wood.

"Did it change anything though? You're still you. You still own the store and you are still married to Ann Marie. What did it change?" 

"My trust, that's what. I mean, what if he came on to me and tried to do stuff to me?!" 

"Dalton, have you ever thought maybe he's just a normal guy? Did we try to do stuff to women when they're in town? No, we didn't. That's because it's immoral. And men who like men are just like men who like women. What about women who like women? They all know right from wrong, Dalton. And Winston is our friend, he'd never hurt a fly. Has he ever hurt you?"

It took a long time to answer but he finally shook his head no. He "No, in fact Winston's always been nice. He's always helpful… I just don't understand how someone can change so suddenly to be gay?"

"Maybe he didn't change, maybe he changed for us? Because we all here at the lodge have wives, maybe he wanted to blend in," Red came to stand out of his chair and come to the other side of the table. "you know I felt the same way you did when I found them making out in the woods."

"Oh my- geez" Dalton almost gagged in his mouth at the very thought. 

"But I went home, thought about it. Compared it to what I did when I was younger. Me and Bernice used to do the same dumb things when we were dating. And I laughed at myself for being judgemental so quickly."

….. 

Gord had kept himself busy while he was alone. He tried his best to tidy the small home on the stairs. He rearranged his 8-tracks, the educational films he created over the years and his teddy bears he kept. But sleeping in the same bed as another made him realize he didn't need them as much. 

He scanned the horizon for any sign of the tanker but none came just yet. His little clock read 5:15, he had spent so much time on organizing he forgot about food. Luckily he had those fruits and vegetables he had bought the day before. 

He wanted to steer clear of any forest add-ins that he so loved in his soups but he stuck with what he could carry. Celery, onions, turnips, carrots and a large round rutabaga. He'd make a simple soup that'd be hearty enough to keep them full.

Just thinking of being the company of that man, it was almost too much for him to handle. He didn't know whether to smile or cry, so he chose to cry. But he cried from happiness, that this feeling of love was actually happening to him. Granted love had waited nearly 40 years of his life to show but it happened regardless. He wondered how old Winston was. In fact he wondered a lot of things they hadn't shared yet. 

Gord wiped away the tears and peeled the vegetables, he wondered how old he was, what his whole life was about. He knew how he felt about him, that was one question out of the way. 

But his thoughts were trailing off to the night before, those little sounds he made, the way his length felt in his hand. The way that pearlescent fluid seeped when he came. He dropped the carrot in his grip and just thought about it, Gord began to wonder what that would be like if he put it in his mouth. How it would taste, would Winston like that even?

So many thoughts came to his mind only to be cut short by the sound of a truck at the bottom of the tower. His toothy smile showed again when he saw that Winston did return like he promised.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Chapter contains sexual situations

Gord placed the carrot and rushed down the stairs as fast as his long legs could carry him. He wanted to meet him down below so they could walk back together. 

Winston rubbed his eyes, he just came back from his home for a shower and cleaned up after the pump out at Dalton's store he tried to push those emotions and thoughts of earlier back. The little man gave a heavy sigh as he rolled the window down in his septic truck. He could see those long legs of the ranger as they ran to the driver's side door. 

If there was a man that was perfect for him here, there he was. Smiling that smile, when he spoke it was this sweet song that was deep and rich. 

"I missed you." Gord put a hand on the window stepping on the metal steps outside the door. Becoming level with each other, Gord came in to kiss those lips once more. Every time he kissed him they got better, his dark brown eyes gave this signal to the other man. 

Maybe this is what Winston needed. This would cover the pain and other emotions that he felt, he knew it would. It's what his father did, to mask the anger of being out of work the senior would be with multiple women. It's all Winston knew. He returned the look of the ranger giving the come hither stare. Gord smiled larger and rushed to the passenger door. 

Winston locked the doors tight and leaned his back against the driver side door as he tried his best to make room for Gord who came from the passenger side. He spread his legs far enough and undid the wader straps on his shoulders. Gord came in to sit on the black leather seat. 

Gordon carefully slid the waders down until they reached his ankles. He never did this but he was ready to try. Gazing across once more as he gave tugs to the fabric of those boxers. He noticed they were a different colour than what he wore just last night. But he pulled them down regardless, exposing the softer area to the elements. He was excited to see how he could make him hard in his hands. 

He kept his eyes peeled on Winston's as he played with the flaccid part by giving it a few pumps, but he stepped his game up when he gave the now exposed head a large lap. He heard the change in tone from that. 

This new feeling of hot wet caused him to grip the seat cover in the septic truck. Gord continued to give licks ranging from large to small multiple ones in a row. He took the first step in allowing the man to enter his body by taking it in his mouth as far as he could. 

Giving a suck to make sure the sensations will be felt he bobbed his head while keeping eyes on the reactions. That face he saw so earlier mixed with more yearning and lust. Winston occasionally grabbed the steering wheel and seat belt to brace himself. A whole new world had been opened before him, this new act Gord presented. He could feel himself becoming hard with each time the ranger sucked and licked. Shutting his eyes to just feel, it was wonderful to have this happen. 

All his life he talked about sucking septics but never did he imagine people could do this. And the person he most loved, giving attention to a part he never thought of. He opened his eyes when Gord stopped sucking and licking, the ranger had to catch his breath. So he gave some more strokes drawing forth a few drops of clear from the head. 

Gord stared right in the eyes of Winston and pressed his tongue against him and took in the pre. It had little taste besides salty, one bead had made its way past the tongue of the ranger and he followed it down. Gord gave soft licks to the underside of the shaft until he made it to his family jewels. Taking the plunge he gave more licks to them, drawing out sounds he hadn't heard before. 

Soft mentions of his name came from Winston as he felt that hot tongue dance over his length. It was enough to make Gord become unhinged at the sound of his name leaving those lips in that tone. He left the man's dick to start to remove his shirt again. Winston watched and moved around to try to sit up as the man opened the buttons of the green shirt. 

Unsure of what to do the smaller man tried his best to move closer to the passenger side of the cab. Those marks from the night before still stained the skin of Gord as he came closer to give more. 

It was a tight fit to move around the front of the tanker but he was able to get onto the lap of the longer legged man and try his best to get him out of those dark green pants. Still erect it was difficult to focus on his task but he managed to get the belt out of the way. 

Gord kept him going by giving pumps but stopping before it brought him any closer. He was able to allow his lover's own to emerge from the constraints of the pants. He looked deep into the dark eyes and gently rubbed his length against the skin. Both men gasped in their own way at the contact. 

Ranger Gord liked it when the smaller man took control over him, rubbing and thrusting against him. Taking both hard members in each other's hand they stroked them the best they could together. But because of the already done attention given to Winston's, he was getting closer than he wanted to be. 

Winston kept thrusting in the lap of Gord as they stroked one another off. The taller man kept his eyes shut and tried to help him by thrusting as well. The sounds of Gord's moans outweighed the soft panting of Winston. But the panting was cut short once he reached his limit, inadvertently he rose higher from sitting to press himself against Gordon's stomach. Both arms braced against the headrest of the seat as he arched his body forward and came. 

The ranger helped him continue his climax by tugging him faster, he felt the warmth of the cum speckle his body and the sound of his love groaning. The hand came back and wrapped around him and gave the love in return as Gord felt himself getting hot. He looked down at the hand around him and shut his eyes as he felt the pushing of his own exit his length leaving it on the shirt of Winston. 

Both men heaved and kissed each other passionately coming in for an embrace. And there they were in the front seats of the 95 thousand dollar tanker truck wrapped in each other's arms after sharing a frenzied moment. It was amazing to Winston but he couldn't help but to start to feel emotional again. He clung to the man in the seat and buried his face into him. 

He knew Gordon would see the teardrops on his shirt and streak his face. He pulled away from the embrace, the sight made Gord's face turn pale. 

"Oh my God I hurt you…" Gord pulled him in for a larger hug to fix it. He didn't mean to try putting it in his mouth. It started to make the ranger's own eyes swell with tears. Winston felt like such a fool. His silent tears fell again, while Gord cried outwardly. Shaking, trembling and hugging him deeper. 

"You didn't hurt me, Gord." Winston finally got the words out as he tried to push his tears  
away. "I… hurt myself. I thought I was going to make all this day go away."

"You...you used me?" Gord was genuinely surprised that the man he thought he found solace in would use him. "I thought you loved me." 

"I do! I didn't use you. I just thought that it would make me feel better about myself." Winston answered trying to pull the boxers up to cover himself. Those damned tears came back, harder than before. They hurt, hurt so much to hold them back. 

"Why didn't you tell me how you felt?" those dark eyes pierced through the pain. They made Winston feel safe even if they had a crazed gleam at times in them. 

"Men don't talk about it." the man answered only to have a hand grab his chin to make him look at the ranger. Gord's eyes softened. 

"But we're men together. You talk in relationships." he eased his grip on the chin of Winston. "I spent a lot of time alone in that tower, and I had time to reflect on myself. I cry, I cry myself to sleep, I cry every night. And when I wake up I feel better, because I am able to express my feelings."

"But…" Winston tried to start but stopped. He knew he had gone around this the wrong way. "I have been holding on to myself for 44 years. I admit that I hurt."

"See? Talk to me. I'm here for you." Gord gave him a soft kiss to his forehead. Now he knew the age of his lover. Older than he was, it was hard to tell at times. But he had all those years of layers piled, Winston was the bigger man for hiding it from the world longer. 

"Can… you," he started but stopped. He wanted to ask but didn't want to be judged. "Can you hold me?" he said, finally ready for laughter. His father always laughed at him, his mother was never wanting to look at him since his father left. 

"Always." Gord wrapped his arms around him, pulling him into the warmest hugs. "You don't even have to ask." he could feel the heaving of the smaller man in his grip. He just wanted to let him cry, and hoped that he would be the one Winston would fall into every time. Not that Gord was a terrible person for loving him crying but he loved that Winston could finally let some of those emotions out. He just held him for as long as needed. 

"Did you really want to do that earlier?" Gord finally asked once he felt the heaving slow down. He indeed loved the moment they shared just a few minutes ago. 

The septic cleaner snorted in the snot as he came up for air from crying. He did love the moment, it was amazing in every way possible, he may have enjoyed it more if he wasn't carrying around this dead weight on his shoulders during it. "I did, Gord. I guess I should have waited" 

"What happened to you?" Gord asked as the man slipped off his legs and on to the driver's seat, allowing the ranger to readjust his pants but not his shirt. It remained off as he unhooked the shoulder strap holding it on. 

"I had made a mistake in telling one of the lodge members that I like men." Winston laid his head on the headrest behind him. 

"What's so bad about that? I tell my imaginary friends that I like men all the time." Gord started to trail on his stories but stopped when he saw the reaction to the imaginary friends. "Well, I just think that it's a good thing to do. Tell others that you are in love."

"But it's Dalton I told it to."

"That's the pot belly man with the store?" Gord leaned in closer. He got a nod for a reply, causing him to pull away. He remembered Dalton. Married. Angry at the world. If anyone was in a more sad state than Gord it was Dalton. The pain of other men made Gord feel better about himself. "Let him be angry. He's nothing to us." Gord spoke sternly, his face didn't smile once after his words. 

Winston let the notion bounce around in his mind for a few seconds. He would just have to treat Dalton as a client for a while instead of a friend. Perhaps with him leaving for a day or two, the heat will be off once returning. Winston gave a nod to the idea and turned to look at the man. 

The skin of Gord was now covered in blemishes from the love making for those two times. Winston still had remains of the one on his neck. Gord looked out the window and suddenly remembered his food he was making. "I have to get back to the top. Won't you join me?" there was that smile again, it warmed Winston's battery's and he returned a full smile himself. 

A small duffle was pushed behind the seats of the truck. He had packed a few essential things he needed to live in the tower for a few days. His newest Anthony Anthony's book he bought but never got to read. He joined the ranger and started the climb to the top.   
This time no worries about holding the hand of his lover. 

Finally reaching the top, Winston found it was organized and cleaned. The bed was straightened and made larger to hold two. He placed his small duffle bag down next to the bed on a barrel and came to sit in a chair. It seemed Gord had started peeling vegetables before he arrived, and the taller man went back to peeling. Gord had placed the shirt back on with lazily buttons holding it together. Winston tried to help by getting a pot for the food. Gord had pointed them out in the plastic milk crate. He loved having someone with him to eat with him. He spent so many years eating alone watching the sunset. 

Winston started to pull the items out of the crate causing a few banging of pots but finally got it out which let loose items free. "What's this Gord?" Winston said picking up the silver ring that rolled from under the pots in the plastic milk crate. 

"Oh! That's just an old ring that I used to have. It got too small for me so I stopped wearing it." he answered. "If you'd like, you can have it." he smiled large and watched the smile return to Winston. 

The septic cleaner tried slipping it on his left hand but it didn't fit. He then slipped it on his right hand and it was just right for him. He smiled large as he looked at it in the setting sun light. It was just a silver band but at that moment he felt he had purpose again. The ring had a few dings and scratches but it was in his mind a representation of their lives before meeting. Filled with nicks and cuts from others but now given new life from one another.


	7. Chapter 7

Sun broke over the tree tops and poured into the cab. Both men tried to avoid the sun's light by hunkering deeper into the blankets. With the size of Winston, they were able to snuggle closer in the makeshift bed. Gord woke with the light as he always did, but instead of watching for fires he searched the light in his lover as he slept. 

Somehow he looked more vulnerable in his sleep. His guard was down and the true innocents of the man could be seen. Gord remembered those words spoken the day before; the hurt, pain and inner suffering all over the course of those years. It all made sense to the ranger as he moved closer to drape his arm over him. In his mind try to transfer his positivity into the other if he just wrapped him in his arms.

The movement of the man next to him caused Winston to start to wake up. His blurry sight recognized Gord holding him, bringing a smile to him as he tried to fall asleep again. The ranger wanted to be happy but his mind churned the words of all of the pain, he knew it wasn't his pain to endure but to imagine how this smaller man could hold that much for all those 44 years to himself. 

Gord had his own pain to live out but at these moments those disappeared little by little with each moment spent together. The man in his arms shut his eyes but unavoidably the sun proved too bright as he rolled onto his back and stared up at the ceiling. Little drawings were stuck to the ceiling, small pictures of hand drawn constellations, buildings around Possum Lake and animals. This was truly the work of a lonely man with too much time in his hands. 

"How'd you sleep?" Gord asked and placed his chin on the pillow next to the man and scooted as close as he could. 

"Like a log." Winston laughed, it made a loud laugh come from Gord. 

"They do sleep pretty good." Gord continued to laugh as he thought of logs sleeping. "I slept good knowing you were next to me." his face glowed in the sun, lighting his features and his smile. 

Winston placed a hand on the back of the brown hair of the ranger and pulled him into a kiss. It caused a small sound to come from Gord as he tasted those lips again. Just as they always did, like perfection only sweeter. 

The only part he hated was when the kiss was over and they pulled away. He hugged Winston close, this was the best morning of his life, just waking up slowly to be able to see the real reason for living. Seeing the gentle smile of first opening his eyes and gazing at the man he loved. 

Winston groggy and waking, sat up in the cot and stretched his back. Sleeping on one side of his body for the night left him sore and stiff but it was all worth it in the end. He never felt so good, feeling the warmth of another next to him gave a calming sense all over his body. 

"Don't suppose you have a way to get clean out here in the woods?" Winston asked, he was a morning shower person, it woke him up along with a cup of coffee.

Gord laid on his back, "I do actually. I'll take you there."

….. 

Winston dropped his duffle bag next to a large boulder that fell from the rock cliff behind them. When Gordon mentioned he had a way to get clean, he didn't expect it to be in the form of the stream that cut through the forest. Winston sat on the boulder and just looked out at the trees. 

Gord was a man who wasn't afraid to take his clothes off, especially now that he had someone to take them off for. He happily undid the buttons to his shirt once more, unhinged the shoulder strap across his chest to allow his shirt to fall to the ground. For once Winston saw the back of the ranger. It was covered in scars from what looked like scrapes from animals. Small rodent claw marks, the kind Ed Frid would talk about from squirrels. As if he wrangled rodents in his spare time. 

But Gord had no qualms of showing his body, as he started to untie his shined brown boots. Placing each one on the ground next to the crumbled shirt. Winston sat on the large stone and just removed the muck boots and sock. He didn't feel much like becoming nude in the middle of the forest. He just continued to watch as the ranger had worked his way to his pants, but to his surprise the ranger didn't wear much when it came to undergarments. In fact he just wore the dark green pants with nothing underneath, he slipped them off one leg at a time and turned to face the man. 

And there he stood, fully nude for all to see. He stood there as if to let Winston see all of him, and there wasn't much of a mark on him besides the hickeys and black hair in all the right spots. He gave a grin and began to go towards the water, testing its temperature as he slowly entered. Giving a loud yell as he let his whole body go under, it made Winston surprised by the sudden yelp. But it seemed to have been in a good way, as he was now enjoying the clear water. 

"Come on in the water's great. But it'll be even better with you in it." Gord spoke as he came back to the shore line of pebbles and rocks, he had noticed the other man had started taking the clothes off. 

"Do you think I could just leave the waders on?" Winston asked undoing the bowtie. Gord gave a jolly laugh and came back to the land. 

"You can't take a bath with your clothes on. Here let me help you." Gord spoke in sincerity and not sexual. He helped the smaller man to his bare feet and undid the waders with ease. He was getting good at that. And let Winston pull them down and off, leaving him in the button down shirt, an undershirt and his boxers. 

With an eye roll Winston began to unbutton his own white shirt, he was not feeling like getting completely naked but Gord was standing just inches away from him naked and wet. He didn't want to explain the small scars on his body to Gord in truth and what happened to him to gain them. It's not as if he was in war or sustained an injury, but instead it was just surgery scars from a botched sewing job after the removal of his gallbladder. 

Gord smiled and waited for the under shirt to come off and expose the skin of his lover. But it didn't happen, as time went by the smaller man knew he had to remove the shirt eventually. Winston pulled it over his head finally showing his body to Gord who in fact loved everything about it. 

Gord traced with his eyes the outline of the hair around his stomach to the lower area, but stopped when he noticed the dark scars. One large on the belly button and a cluster to the right, with no understanding of personal space Gord reached and touched them. 

He felt the warmth of the skin under his fingertips, the feeling of the other man taking breaths slowly. The marks didn't have a feel to them, just lines left on the skin. He traced them with a finger and gazed into the eyes of the man. Gord loved anything of Winston's, these scars were a part of him. Gord lowered himself down to the stomach of the man and gave them small kisses on each scar. 

The good intentions of the ranger came to Winston in a sexual way as he felt those kisses trail on his body. He tried to calm his feelings inside as much as he could, but the ranger made it difficult by taking the step of pulling the boxers off to help him get into the water. 

As Gord did he noticed the half aroused member of the man. They had no intention of becoming in this situation but it was turning into it. Gord looked up at the man with questioning in his dark eyes. Neither man knew what to do, either take the wrong way to handle this situation or do what both men seemed keen on doing. 

To bond in this way again is what both men wanted, but also to be together in other ways. The thoughts swam around in Winston's mind as he pondered the right way to go about this. As he thought Gord stood to tower over him again, he took his hand and decided to walk to the water together. 

It wasn't every day that Winston would be nude in the middle of the forest taking a bath in the clean waters before it reached Possum Lake. Ignoring the call for more from his body Winston chose to be with Gord to make memories instead of hasty decisions. With his baggy waders and large sized shirt removed, Winston was a small person but knowing Gord was glad with him no matter calmed his worry. 

The rocks in the shore of the stream hurt with each step, the septic cleaner wasn't used to going without shoes and grass. The water was cool with each step further into it. Thankfully it was cool enough to ease the thoughts in his mind as he gingerly crept to keep his balance. The water came up enough to cover his exposure as the ranger let his grip ease to dip back into the stream. 

"I usually come here as much as possible." Gord said as he sunk his head into the water to wet his hair. It turned black as he emerged, giving him a different look from his combed over hair. The smaller man decided to be like the other and get comfortable in the water. Winston came to get his whole body wet in the stream easier, it flattened his curling hair. 

"I'm glad I can share a little of my life with you, Winston." Gord finally spoke his name as he came to wade through to reach him. It was a shock to hear his name mentioned but it was just perfect when he spoke it. 

"Gee Gord, I like it out here. No one to bother you, just getting back to your own thoughts." he turned to face the tower that rose over the trees. It's rock cliff cradled the wooden structure over the forest, it looked like a monument in the wilderness. A pinnacle to the devoted man who stood beside him. 

"Sometimes being alone with your thoughts isn't a good thing. I've spent years alone with my thoughts, I often wonder if anyone has really noticed that I left." Gord towered over the man as he stared at his home, thinking of the days spent out here. 

"I'm sure someone did. If I would have known you earlier, I'd notice." Winston smiled and made his way back to the shore. "I didn't move to Possum Lake until the early nineties." he picked up the duffle to pull a pair of clean clothes. 

"I appreciate that," Gord scanned the horizon instinctively. "Nah, sometimes I think that even you'd be one to forget about me." he just let those words slip from his mouth without thinking. 

"What?" Winston heard those words as he pulled the clean pair of boxers over him. "You're giving me a bad rap, eh? Give me a chance here." He gave a huff as he pulled regular jeans from his bag. He saved them for times at home when he could sit on his couch and read his books. This was any time to use his off the clock clothes for once.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to say that… I'm just not very good at communicating." Gord began to tremble with sadness as he approached the man who was half dressed. He knew he had crossed the line and lost his savior of his sanity. His sadness was stopped by a small hand grasping his. 

"No, I just overreacted. I'm sorry." he looked down at the ground as he felt the hand he held grip his back. The two looked deep into each other's eyes in silence, finally bringing a smile to Gord. "Look why don't we go eat something? I remember passing a joint on the way here."

He got a large smile as the ranger raced to get dressed, but in his haste let the white button shirt of Winston fall into the water soaking it thoroughly. He feared the repercussions of his actions but he didn't get yelled at. 

"We'll have to skip the food until this dries." he held the dripping wet shirt. 

"Wait, I have extra shirts of mine at the tower." Gord's eyes lit up as he spoke. He slipped the deep green pants up and began to pick the rest of the clothes off the ground. Winton followed as he trudged back to the tower shirtless. The walk down the slope was easier than going back to the top. 

…. 

Winston waited at the bottom of the stairs as the ranger raced to the top carrying the soaked shirt to hang to dry and a dry one back down. Winston was down below fixing his muck boots to go under the legs of his jeans, when Gord tapped his bare shoulder gaining his attention. 

The shirt was another forestry shirt but once the man put it on the size difference caught up with him. He looked like a child wearing his father's clothes but it'd have to do for the time being. He buttoned it up, in truth it felt refreshing to have a new article of clothing to wear. The two matched like a couple as they approached the tanker. 

Gord questioned the use of the tanker to drive to eat, the smell alone to him made him dizzy and weak in the stomach. He didn't want to mention anything about the tanker smelling. He was just glad that he was allowed to go with someone. The cab of the tanker made him bite the inside of his mouth, thinking of their time shared right there. The black seats where all the love happened. 

Gord looked over at Winston who closed his door, locking it. The man seemed in his element sitting in that seat. Commander of his field, in Gord's mind commander of him too. The way he just took control, seeing the professional Winston compared to the Winston that Gord knew. The secret sexual master of love making, it made the taller man begin to unravel there in the seat. 

"Oh baby…." Gord whispered as he looked at the man, experiencing strong primal urges. 

"What?" 

"I said 'Oh baby, this tanker sure is tall." Gord saved himself from the embarrassment of letting his words slip too soon after the nice time they shared. He straightened in his seat as the engine began to rumble, he was truly excited to be in a vehicle once again on the road. But the thought of leaving his post for once in his years there started to make him anxious. What if a fire started? Who would know, how would anyone save the forest? 

"It'll only be an hour or two." Winston spoke as he drove the tanker onto the trail. He could sense by Gord's body language that something was off, how the taller man kept staring back to his tower. It was helpful to know that his worry was taken away a little, that he'd only be away for an hour. 

He gave one final look back in the mirror as the tanker reached the paved road. It had been what seemed like forever not being on the road. When he got the fresh vegetables he drove the atv he was given to patrol the forest, but he had cut across in his environment he knew best. On the open road things seemed bigger and emptier. 

"When you said you moved here, where did you move from?" the first thought into the ranger's mind came out. He was hoping for a better conversation starter but it's what his mind gave. A short pause between the two as they had reached a road sign. 

"It's a small town not too far from Mercury Creek. Poor too. Couldn't even afford a name. My father used to work not too far from town at the railroad. Then he was laid off." Winston rounded the corner and kept driving. He knew the area enough to know the location of the diner. "And well, he just wasn't the same after that. And I got into my own business of septic services, and the rest of history. How about you?"

"Smokey the bear was talking to me about, I can prevent forest fires. Strange as it sounds I believed him. And got a job in the forestry department and have been forgotten ever since." he let a loud cry as he thought of those years forgotten alone in the tower. Winston snapped his neck to look at him, this tall man blubbering in the seat next to him. He reached out and grabbed him, squeezing the hand of the ranger to calm him. 

"I joined the Possum Lodge before I left for my job. And Red checks up on me once a week. It used to be each month but we changed that. Since my old tower fell over and I moved to 13. It's closer to the lodge. And I can see the lodge with my binoculars, everyone having fun…"

Winston remained quiet as he let the man talk. He knew that he was getting closer to the diner, he let his hand slip away to help turn the wheel as they made it. The diner was small with one car parked to the side of it. It had the appearance of an old train stop, red original paint peeked through the white unevenly coated paint. A few train signs decorated the walls on the outside, where they came from the old abandoned track lay behind. Trees and grass had grown between the wood bars on the track. 

Rock Reef Diner flashed in a lazy buzzing sign, as the two jumped out of the tanker parked on the side. Gord just stared at the location, not in distaste but in awe that human life was so close to his tower and no one knew he existed. A small hand patted him on the back and he followed the man, trying not to walk too fast but not too slow. It was difficult when his legs were longer than the other's. 

A bell rang as the glass door opened and closed behind them. It was smokey, quiet aside the radio that played soft music next to the counter and crammed with more signs. The two took to a booth and sat. 

Winston gave a yawn as he lifted the menu from the sticky table, Gordon followed suit and lifted the menu. He didn't have a clue what he was hungry for. But seeing the placement of all these foods before him he couldn't pick one. 

A waitress came by to take the order. Winston had already had his mind made up on the coffee and starter plate which consisted of eggs, bacon, sausage and hash browns. Gord on the other hand continued to gawk at the food, until he made his mind set on the pancakes. 

"Are these pancakes made with fresh or dried leaves?" Gord asked the woman before she left, gaining a glare and no answer. Winston just started forward, maybe it was a bad idea to allow Gord to be around people. 

"When I make my pancakes I use dried leaves, ground into a fine powder. It's good." Gord spoke to the man across the table from him, getting a small chuckle. He knew that he was serious but he couldn't believe he was serious at the same time. 

"Are you upset?" Gord asked as he saw the man didn't change his expression. 

"I'm tired Gord. I need my coffee and something to eat. I'm not angry." Winston answered, rubbing his eyes. Gord saw the ring on his right hand, it made him smile knowing that he wore something of his proudly. "You stay here, I'm going to use the restroom." 

Gord sat in the booth and waited, he was an expert at waiting. His eyes looked at all the signs bolted to the wood of the building. He looked out the window to the road watching a few cars pass by. He was just jittery from the excitement of eating and being out of the tower. This trip is the third time this month he has left. And he had no problems with that as each time being for the special someone in his life. Even if the person wasn't a morning person without his coffee. 

Winston came to sit back down, he was different from the bright eyed man all had come to see in his commercials around the Possum Lake and Port Asbestos. The food finally made it way to the table, as he gave attention to the strong black drink. Gord had a glass of orange juice with his order, to which he turned his gaze to the stack on his plate. 

The two shared silence as they ate, the pancakes tasted like the kind he had the first year as a ranger until his bag of mix ran out. Winston offered some bacon from his plate to Gord's pleasure. Gord ate his meal in the fastest time, he had an appetite for more. His sights were cast on the pies in the cold fridge by the counter. 

He looked at them and then back at the man who was still eating his eggs. A nod from him gave Gord a large smile as he walked to the case. Which flavour did he want? The strawberry rhubarb, or the blueberries? Cherry was always good too. Gord looked over at the man drinking his coffee, he looked like a cherry kind of guy. 

Gord opened the fridge and pulled out the slice of cherry pie, carefully bringing it over to the table. He grinned to himself as he watched the final hash brown be eaten. He started to eat the pie, leaving the other half for Winston. 

He couldn't help but to feel endearment with each second that passed. He was falling deeper in love with him. He looked his body over as Winston ate the second half of the slice. Gord was so famished for love, those times they were tangled up together quenched just the thirst but not the hunger. Gord rubbed his knee closer to the man across from him, gaining a sputter as he drank the remaining drops of coffee. 

Winston wasn't feeling in the mood for love making, he was only just waking up more and more. The sexual thoughts were pushed aside like they always had been, but he knew he had to return to the lodge sooner or later. "Gord not right now, okay?" he whispered nicely and put down the money for the food as they began to walk out. 

The taller man felt he may have crossed the line, "I'm sorry." Gord looked down as they walked across the gravel parking lot. 

"Don't be sorry, Gord. I got a lot on my mind right now. I don't want to push myself to do it again when I don't feel in the mood." he said and closed the door behind him to the truck. Gord nodded and kept his head down the whole ride back.


	8. Chapter 8

The ride was filled with silence, Gordon didn't know if he was doing the right thing or not. He was conflicted with his own urges but also to respect the fact that Winston wasn't feeling like going down that path at this time. 

"I'm sorry I acted like that." Gord finally spoke after silence, bringing more confusion to the other man. Winston had honestly forgotten about the whole thing. "How I wanted to do more of that stuff." Gord had to remind him. 

"Hey listen Gord, it's really no big deal. Alls I said was not right now." Winston halted at the stop sign and changed his sites to Gord from the road. He didn't see the problem with no being said. 

"You don't like me?" the ranger felt hurt, his feelings weren't being reciprocated in a way that he felt showed he was loved. 

"I never said anything like that…Look, you have to learn that I don't feel like it all the time, eh. I've spent my whole life doing abstinence, so I'm used to holding back."

"Well I've spent years in the forest as a virgin and I'd like some human interaction if you get that?" Gord began to start to cry. His body craved the attention he desired. He couldn't believe he let the word slip his lips, that he was a 40 year old man who had been denied love of any form. 

"Maybe human interaction can be in the form of us just being together at times too." Hearing that Gord was also a virgin made Winston's mind ease. He and the ranger were on the same page but went different ways of handling the situation. Winston heard the sobbing of Gord through the silence of the situation, he didn't know whether to talk to him about these feelings or allow him to continue on this path. When the sound of tears and crying began to overwhelm the smaller man behind the wheel, he finally spoke as they rounded the corner to get closer to the tower. 

"You know, Gord, I'm in the same state as you. You're the first person I kissed ever. And it was something. You're the first person to see and touch me down there." Winston told the man as the crying began to ease once the tanker had come to a complete halt. He turned in the seat to look at Gord. Nothing seemed to stop the man from sobbing, it wasn't what the smaller man wanted at the moment. "I'm going to have to drop you off and get back into town." 

The ranger was left even sadder, he wiped the tears from his eyes and looked at him. "Why do you have to leave?" the news was so sudden. 

"I have a few things to do in town. Settle an issue and hopefully get back here soon." Winston said and let the ranger wrap his arms around him to give a hug. He hated that he had to go so soon after the time they enjoyed at the diner and the time at the tower but the world outside was still there. Winston gave a small kiss to Gord's lips as they broke the embrace. 

The ranger got out of the tanker, watching the large truck pull away from his sights. There went what little sanity he had left on earth, he let go of the sadness as it streamed his cheeks again. The climb of the tower was relentless to him in this state. He just wanted to get to the top and just bury himself in the sheets and never come out. Watch for fires? What fires. There was never a fire in this location for all the years of his time here, why should he spend his time searching for something that never comes. Much like looking for love. Why should he search for it when it never comes to him. 

He could feel the tension between them, that awkward situation that hung in the air like fog. The way Winston had left as fast as he could, he knew he embarrassed him in public. That was last time he'd see him. 

Gord reached the top and realized that the clothes were still left to dry, the off white shirt blew in the breeze, the duffle bag filled with the hip waders from earlier and the self help book. The hard helmet left on the floor next to the cot, Gord lifted it from the wooden floor holding it in his hands. It had scratches and one deep cut in the top of it, Gord was thankful for the helmet being there to take the blow of that cut. A small name scribbled underneath gave it the possession of Winston Rothschild, it brought a smile to the ranger as he placed it on the small crate next to the chairs. 

He had to at least give a go in his job, this non paying, lonely job. Gord scanned the trees through the binoculars, in truth searching for the large tanker in the distance. 

Being a forest ranger he knew he had to be quick to find danger in the forest but deep down Gord had his own. He recalled that Winston told him his inability to smell. It wasn't bad, it helped in his job, it made the sewage services easy to get through. Gord however had a job finding fires in trees, it was easy because he could smell but difficult because he couldn't see those two colours, red and green. 

He found ways to deal with his colour blindness, he found that things that are supposed to be red are usually a darker yellow mixed with brown. And trees that are always green are yellow with slight brown to them. But in a sea of trees it was difficult to find anything. He couldn't keep staring at nothing, lowering the binoculars and just coming to a slump in the wooden chair near him. 

…. 

As he drove, Winston kept the thoughts of Gord in his mind. That sad defeated face when told he had to leave for town. Rothschild didn't want to go anywhere but if the open wound of uneasiness still bled it would cause a flood throughout the lodge. Dalton was one of the men that couldn't hold on to a secret, if he found any information about anyone it'd spread as fast as he grabbed money from his customers. 

Without Gord sitting next to him it felt empty in the tanker, almost cold. Is this what his life was like before Gordon came into it? Just a cold lie of a life of non stop working and house calls to compensate for his lack of love. Winston could agree with himself as he drove this road to the lodge, but it ate away at him from the inside. He hated to agree with the facts that he was ordinarily a sad man himself just filling the void with work. And now he found that there was more to life than work but it was hitting at a price. Learning to juggle both at times, one side to work until his body hurt giving that thrill of achievement. On the other, to be held at night and smile during the day. 

The drive was long enough to give him time to prepare and to go over every terrible outcome he could come up with. Being kicked from the lodge as a member, to lose his job and everything he built from the ground up. Even now he was able to think of even losing Gord. 

He took the dirt path lined with dead and gutted cars almost like topiaries of a handyman. It was a change of scenery from the dense forest of the Rock Reef to the Possum Lodge garbage collection. Not that he wasn't grateful for the scraps left in those old cars he wouldn't still be driving around in his own multiple cars, but something about the sight of the garage now made the entrepreneur want to just leave. 

Now he had to find the courage to make a decision. To let himself live in fear of someone that wasn't his family or to stand above this narrow mindedness. Maybe at times Harold was right about the men in the lodge and them being afraid of anything different. Even though Winston was afraid of the different as well, he thought the same as the others, so why did Dalton think he was different? 

It was hard to wrap his mind around it as he pulled the break of the tanker leaving it in park, the cars lined around the lodge told him that he wasn't going to be the only one here. Everyone he knew was there, this was going to be just one of those days. 

He came from his driver seat to meet the stone and dirt ground taking slow steps to the wooden door. The shotgun plastic casings created into a string light display swung above the door as he opened it gingerly. The voices came from the basement of the lodge, the rowdy men could be heard hollering and cheering. By the sounds it was a birthday party put on for a member, Winston was glad he missed that. He hated these events the most, it was just sitting in a room with the others drinking. He got guff from the others for not drinking but he gave that all up when he saw the effect it had on his father and how far it pushed him to give up on his own life. 

His head was turned to focus on the doorframe that led to the lower floor, trying to give himself a boost before he made that descent . 

"I didn't expect to see you back so soon." a raspy voice whispered behind him causing him to turn around as fast as he could. He saw Red Green standing there with a case of beer and a sideways smile on his face. Red knew the man wouldn't stay away too long, this was Winston. The man who didn't give up on something he was passionate about. But he didn't expect to see the man out of his work clothes instead of just dressed in jeans and a mint green ranger shirt and no helmet. 

"I came to clear the air."

"The air was clear when you took the septic truck out of town." Red gave a chuckle leading the man to sit on the bumper couch. He tried to make the man laugh but was met with a blank expression. 

"I'd offer you a drink but I know you wouldn't take it." Red spoke to break the short silence. "Winston, if you want to clear the air, coming back to bring up the conversation with Dalton won't make him stop. That man is old and this is how he's been for years, no amount of talk will change him."

"What about money?" Winston asked, hoping that the wave of a check will be enough to stop the conversation the best way he could think.

"Well, it's Jane but where's Tarzan?" A familiar voice tore through the empty room, Dalton sauntered into the main floor. Stopping just before the couch, his arms crossed and a look of disappointment on his face. 

"Dalton, take it easy." Red spoke trying to break the glares the two men gave one another. Winston stood but lacked the height of  
the bigger man to seem imposing. 

"Why are you here?" Dalton was generally confused, he didn't know what to say to him. Fact he was beginning to tire of the thought of it, but just seeing Winston appear out of nowhere made him remember what he was against. 

Those words reminded Winston of his father, all those years of disappointment his old man held for him. He clenched his jaw and stood taller trying to be more threatening. "I came here to make sure that you know I'm not afraid of you. And-and that I'm not sorry." in truth once standing here he didn't know what to say and why he was even here. It started to feel like a bad idea.

Red shook his head at this, it was just a petty conversation of two stubborn men, both thinking they were right in their own way but never coming to an agreement. 

"Okay you want to play this game," Dalton said and bent down to be face to face with the smaller man, "I'm not sure if I feel comfortable with you. Being one of those and never telling anyone. How can I trust you now?" 

"Maybe because you trusted me before."

"that was before you decided to like men." Dalton was starting to raise his voice, his thick Canadian accent began to come out. 

"Dalton I've always liked men. But why should I put that out there?" Winston let his body a rest of trying to puff his chest out. 

"If you didn't put it out there back then, why put it out there now? I don't want to see you being disgusting with a man."

"We haven't done anything in public, that's just your own thoughts. You make it sound like you're having fantasies of two men." Winston sat back on the couch with a smug smile. "Makes me feel you're in the closet.

Dalton gave a lounge at the smaller man trying to grab him but he escaped being faster than he seemed. 

"Stop." Red raised his voice at the two. "You both are acting like children. Forty year old children."

"Let me get this across to you, Winston. You are useless. You have no purpose here anymore, you should just get out of here and never come back!" Dalton shouted from behind Red who stood in the way of the two. The basement of members peeked around the door frame at the yelling, all stunned. They came into the room to form a small crowd around the three. 

Those words, they stuck in and pulled everything up from being hidden. Those were just like his father's, "I'm not useless!" Winston shouted back trying to grab at Dalton to pick a fight, Red blocked the way placing both hands on the shoulders of him. The other men made sounds at the argument that unfolded before them. Dalton showed no fear against him. 

"Maybe try to get some height on you and we can deal like men. Right now it's like fighting a woman, what with you liking men." Dalton snapped back, gaining laughs from the crowd. They had all heard from Dalton the situation of Winston's love. 

Thankfully Walter had come from the crowd to hold the septic cleaner back by wrapping his arms around his waist. His anger was rising within him as he heard the laughter of the other men around. Winston had tried for his life to not be a joke, he'd been mocked as a child by the others and his own family, now he was by the other men he thought were his friends. 

"Go home to that tree you fell out of in the forest." Dalton gave one last quip causing more laughter, Red shot him a glance telling him the time is over for jokes. Winston stopped fighting against Walter's grasp, the laughter soaked into him. He stood still hoping to allow Walter to let go.

Once the arms around his stomach eased, he began for the door only to give an angry kick to the junk piled on itself and slamming the door closed. 

"I want everyone downstairs now." Red spoke in a gruffer voice, all the laughter and jokes stopped at that moment. How he wished Harold was here to give some guidance on these matters. Harold seemed to know a lot of things like this. But he'd have to go on a whim. 

….. 

The anger was seething throughout his body like it had replaced his blood. Winston drove, he had no idea where he was going. He just needed to get his items back and just go to his home. Take time to get on track again, he knew that he was unfit to juggle more than just work in his life. If he didn't fall in love, he could have kept his secret forever. Thoughts were all gone from his mind as the truck blew past all stop signs to reach the fire tower. 

He had no one to blame for the fact he was wrong to come back to the lodge at this time. Who was he to try to change the minds of the man he had been associated friends with? Red was right, he can't change the perspective of a stubborn man but he hoped that maybe he could slip some sense into it. 

Over the trees, grew the wooden tower, shading the ground below. Gord smiled as he saw the tanker coming back so soon. His heart skipped a beat as he bit his bottom lip. The best thing in his life really did come back like he had promised. That awkward moment he believed that he created was just a short story. Gord bolted down the stairs to give him a kiss, a kiss that told him he missed everything about the man. Winston slammed the metal door and began to Coen towards him. 

"Winston!" Gord shouted as he sped on the steps, gripping the handrail to avoid falling. He could just plant so many smooches all over him, but the feeling that came off him felt off. "Your shirt is dry." He smiled hoping to see a returning smile but none came as he was passed. No kiss or acknowledgement. Gord was frozen in place for a split second as he regrouped his thoughts. 

"How was everything in town? Did you get it all settled, the thing you told me to before you left?" Gord continued to ask as he climbed the wooden steps again breathing hard from just running down them. He gained no response once again. "I hope it went well. I missed you again." he put a playful hand on the small shoulder of Winston. 

"Stop." Winston finally said midway up the stairs. He paused to just try to ease his anger as he turned back to the climb. Gord stood still as he heard the man reach the cab of the tower. The ranger just heard silence grow in the woods, he slowly came to meet the man. He sat in a wooden chair, just staring at nothing. He looked like a caged animal that had enough of human interaction, that it'd just turn on the hand that feeds it next. 

"Why is it every time you leave, you come back worse than you left?" Gord asked as he entered the cab and stood with his arms crossed. He leaned up against the ledge waiting for the answer. 

"Maybe because there's more out there than this fantasy world you live in, Gord." he fumed as he stood to collect his dry clothes. He had no thoughts at the moment, just anger. Gord nodded and backed out of the way he could in the small area. 

The words genuinely hurt the ranger, "I may live in a fantasy world but at least I have a world to come back to when I leave the fantasy." Gord gave back to the man, gaining a clenched jaw from Winston who removed the ranger shirt from his small frame to place the white shirt on. 

"What are you trying to say?" Winston asked as he stood up from his duffle bag. And tossed the ranger shirt to the ground in his anger. 

"I read some of that self help book while you were gone. Do I live in fantasy or do you? You feed yourself these books to make you feel better when you work in a nowhere job. It's a useless thing." Gord knew how he could hurt another too. 

"I've been doing this business longer than I have been doing you!" Winston came closer to the man who towered over him.  
"My old man was just as bad as you. He called me useless all the time, and never wanted me near him. And you know what? I raised myself to be better than him. And I'm going to raise myself to be better off without you, Gordon!" he shouted, grabbing his bag and book, stuffing it into the duffle as he stomped out of the cab. 

Gord stayed where he was, he may have ruined it by opening his mouth in trying to hurt Winston. He didn't want to even look at the slamming of the truck door, each sound was just another step the man was getting further out of his life but he couldn't find the motivation to stop him. 

Gord let his eyes shut tight as he heard the break release, hot tears formed in his eyes and fell. He walked to the ledge of the cab and watched as the tanker left dust going back to the road and civilization. 

"Go and leave!" Gord shouted to the leaving tanker. He fell to his knees letting his cries echo throughout the forest wrapping his arms around him the best he could. And that was the end to the happiness of two weeks. "Please come back…"


	9. Chapter 9

A week had crawled on so slow, the lodge hadn't heard anything from Winston since he started that fight with Dalton. The orders for septic cleaning had begun to back up all the customers who called for a visit that was promised months in advance. 

Red knew what was at hand, but he couldn't bring himself to go. He'd just be going into the den of a depressed man. In fact he never had been to the man's home, he was worried about that the most. 

"Uncle Red, you have to check on one of them." Harold spoke on the phone with his uncle, who scratched his white beard. Red knew he had to go. 

"What do I even say to this? I don't know what to do in these situations." Red added as he heard the small noises of his nephew. 

"Just talk to them. I know it sounds difficult but I find that if you just let them do the talking it makes it easier to understand."

"Wow Harold, where did you learn that trick from?" 

"You and Aunt Bernice. She talks and you listen."

"No I'm tuning her out, you'd know that if you were married." Red gave a good chuckle to his nephew who gave an odd sound on the phone as he hung up on the younger man. He'd just have to treat this like a marriage then. Just ask one thing and let the man spill the beans. What if Winston won't open up? He should have asked Harold before he hung up on him. He could go to Gord but that man was even more unsteady than the lesser. Red had his choices and the fact he didn't want to talk to either made it more difficult. 

A small tapping on the door frame broke the old man from his thoughts. Dalton stood there looking pensive. 

"Hey Red," he began as he entered the room. Red's office had seen a lot of company in the past few weeks. "I did some thinking about the whole Winston thing. And I may have been a little hard on him."

"Really? Change of heart or did your store bathroom overflow from all those paper towels you flush?" Red asked as he adjusted his cap. The look on Dalton's face told him everything. "Winston talks about his job. You're a repeat offender he says." Red laughed as he left the room. 

Red had made his mind up, he'd go to Winston's home first, many of the lodge members had seen the tanker parked in a yard almost outside of town, now he'd just have to find the house. He'd been to Dalton's home, small and shabby he figured that Winston would be in the same condition. 

A gentle rain had begun to fall from the darkening clouds above, Red wanted to get back home before heavy rain began later in the evening. This was all riding on how well Winston takes the visit and getting him to talk. 

He followed the directions on the small business card the entrepreneur handed out when he first started at the lodge. Hoping for it would lead him to the right place. The trees began to thin as he traced the road in the blue possum van, the homes began to disappear after a few miles out of the Lake area. Red grew nervous he'd had to ask for directions but the sight of the large tanker told him he was getting close. He pulled the van from the road and into the gravel driveway. 

This house wasn't what he expected of the man, it was a log cabin home but not shabby or small. But in fact kept in the best condition compared to the rest of the members taking care of themselves. The lawn wasn't too big but it was mowed down in a stripe pattern, small shrubs lined the log walls by the front door. He parked his van next to the red 1988 Plymouth Reliant, the small K car was dwarfed in the shadow of the septic tanker. 

The older man stuffed his hands in his pockets to avoid touching anything that may still have the remains of a sewage job, as he knocked on the wooden door. The curtains were opening in the windows telling him that Winston was home. Giving another knock, Red heard the sound of the lock unhitching from the inside and there stood the short man. He just wore a t-shirt sporting the logo of his own business, along with simple jeans. 

He looked out of place and exhausted. The smile had faded from his face as he stayed in the door, it was like it was never there in the first place. The two men just stared at one another for a moment, Red didn't want to seem as if he wanted to rush things along but he began to make conversation. 

"How've you been?" the gruff voice asked, gaining a grunt in return. "Not good, huh?" 

"That's putting it mildly." Winston allowed him to enter from the rain, as he walked back to the sofa. Red knew the man had money but he was living in one of the better houses in the whole Possum Lake area. Red wiped his ragged shoes on the small mat at the door and came into the room. 

The trophies of caught fish hung up on the wall all mounted in different poses, small picture frames lined the walls in the mix of fishing. Red was cautious to not touch anything still but the home didn't have any trace of sewage, only for the advertising flyers and signs left near the door for Winston to grab before he left for work. Books were covering the floor, all his self help guides from the various 'experts' he loved to read from. Each one was stacked high, he spent more money on them then he did on new clothes, Red knew it was a bad thing to buy them but if hearing he was worth it was the only reason for Winston to buy the books. 

Winston turned the television off and tried to make room for the older man to sit in the recliner near the matching sofa. "Just doing a little catching up in my reading." Winston finally said gaining a small sound from Red as he sat in the plush chair. 

"You know I never read anything on this in Anthony Anthony's books…" he said as he placed the book on the stack. 

"On what?" Red asked as he enjoyed the feel of the cushion. 

Winston tried to smile and answer but it came off wrong, "Heart break…" he took a deep breath and rubbed his eyes to stop the tears from coming back. He didn't want to be the one to start crying in front of his guest. 

Green watched at the very bad attempt to hide sadness and let the man try to get himself straightened up. 

"Winston, look I'm here because I think we need to talk." just saying that they needed to talk felt so wrong. In all his life he never wanted to talk about feelings, especially feelings of that of another man. The two gave silence, not even Winston wanted to talk. 

After what felt like hours the smaller man finally spoke, "I forgot my helmet at the fire tower…" he tried to avoid the topic of Gord or anything related to it. 

"Whatcha got on your finger there?" Red knew the ring came from Gord and it was his key to open the gate around the man. "A ring?" 

"Yeah. I picked it up at the tower and Ranger Gord said that I could have it."

"Ranger Gord' coming from you just sounds off. Look Winston, just quit playing this game. Do you like him or no."

"I mean, yeah I like him but-" Winston left the couch to just avoid eye contact. He stood by the window watching the horizon, in his own mind trying to find that tower but he knew it was further in the distance. 

"So you do feel something for him. Because you would have used past tense there." Red had a gleam in his eyes as he started to understand why women liked to pick apart a sentence. It gave him more time to open the shell of the smaller man. 

"You got me. Yes I still like him, fact I kind of find myself thinking that I love him...but I don't know what love feels like."

"It feels like anything. See with Bernice and me, it's just being together anyway we can." Red let the man mull it over. 

Winston turned from the window giving a heavy sigh, "well, I love the way he hugs me. And he listens to me about work. And he's just there for me…" he came to sit on his couch again. "I was a complete ass wasn't I?" 

"Major. But you can go back and fix this you know." Red looked at the man who now just sat back in the pillows. 

"I can't do anything. I've left that part of my life behind. I'm moving forward." To avoid going back Winston acted he was fine. 

"I know that you want to go back. See I remember when you came back from giving that card to Ranger Gord," Red moved closer in the chair to the couch. "You came through that door like you were high on life."

He gained a small nod in return. Winston knew he was feeling differently when he came back for the first time. It was like he really did have reason to smile, a real honest reason. He found that love can be for everyone, even a man like himself. And now that feeling had left his body when he left Gord. 

"What should I do?" he finally asked, wishing he could just turn back time and it would have never happened in the first place. 

"Apologies first. I've known Ranger Gord for years and the man is very fragile." the older man told him as he stood up, trying to drag the smaller out the door. 

Winston went to the other room to change his clothes from home wear to his rubber waders and button shirt. The bowtie was tied as he began for the door, Red gave a smile to himself as he watched the determination of the septic cleaner. 

Once outside the rain had begun to come down heavier and the sky darkened, the two rushed to the Possum van. 

Without his hard hat, his short brown hair became soaked to the scalp. It dripped off his hair down his face, he had already cried all he could for the past week. Feeling the cool water run down his cheek gave him a reminder, his own started to well up in his eyes. 

The van was on its way down the street to the fire watch tower. To get this whole situation straightened out and all the pieces can fit in the puzzle of the lodge again. Winston could get back to work and Gord could be Gord. Red had no idea what it really was that Gord did besides eat things he shouldn't. 

"This storm is really picking up, Red." Winston broke the thoughts of the older man. He was worried about entering the tower during rain. The echo of thunder told both men they'd better make this house call fast. The van sped down the wet streets splashing up water in the potholes, jostling the two inside. 

It took them nearly thirty minutes to get within distance of the wooden tower, seeing it stand taller than the trees. Winston's heart began to beat faster than expected, he didn't know he'd feel this way. He didn't want to know that he really did need to see Gord again, that the whole thing wasn't just a daydream of puppy love. But it wasn't now, it was deeper than that to him. This was real. 

The van pulled close to the structure allowing the faster man to bolt to the stairs. Red stayed in the van, he didn't feel much like getting wet. He just watched the small man running up the stairs. 

Winston headed to the top as fast as he could go, the rush of taking these steps again made his body race. 

"Gord!" he shouted as he made it to the cab. But it was empty. The man looked around the cab for any trace of the man. He searched the cot, only finding his hard helmet on the pillow next to Gord's. The ranger slept with the helmet next to him to remind him of the man he loved and lost. Now Winston felt worse for what he had done, he placed the hat back on his head and continued to search. 

He ducked when a loud crack of lightning traced the sky, being 135 feet in the air wasn't the best choice in a storm. Once the sound of the thunder left, he peered over the edge of the tower trying hard to locate the man. The heavy rain made it difficult to see anything as he ran back down the stairs. 

"Red! He's not here!" the smaller man yelled as he rushed to the van hoping for some sort of direction of what to do next. Red began to become genuinely concerned, Gord never left the tower. He rummaged through the fast food cups and bags for his flashlights. The man gave one to the smaller, gaining a worried expression. 

"We'll have to go find him." Red told him finally as another flash of light streaked in the sky followed by a roar of thunder.


	10. Chapter 10

This was an event that only mattered to them, bringing in others would just cloud the situation more. Red and the sole employee to his own company, Winston tried their best in the fading light that broke through the thick blanket of clouds occasionally. The heavy rain won out the light once the evening began to creep in, Red would miss the lodge meeting, but he knew the men could go one day without him being there. It’d be odd not seeing the lodge leader not present but not the end of world, but somehow loosing track of Gord felt like it was. Red never knew how much he did deep down enjoy visiting the fire warden, it was a little thing like that he started to cherish in his later years. Granted it took him until his late 50’s to understand the importance of talking and listening to others, but he wouldn’t jump onto doing this every conversation. At this moment it mattered to talk to the man who led the way of guessing locations that Ranger Gord would be. 

Winston tried his best to keep his head in this, but his heart was beating faster than it ever had. It was difficult to keep steady when so many thoughts raced through his mind; from how he treated Gord in the last minutes before leaving him, what he said replayed over and over. He didn’t want to be better off without Gord, fact he was better with Gord and he now saw this. Like the hothead he was it wasn’t until it was too late to see something right before his eyes, he just wanted to find Gord and apologize and hope that all this could be just out behind him. Rothchild did the one thing he never wanted to do, to become like his father. To have the anger get in the way of those he loved, now he did just that. Let the anger from Dalton ruin everything, he should have just let it go and never gave it another thought. 

The pathways made in the forest ran like small streams of mud and water, they retraced each step they could recall. From the trail Red found them to the river Winston and Gord bathed in, but each try came up empty handed. Not one trace of the ranger in the rain that fell in such a force it looked as if it was sheets hitting them and soaking through their clothes. Red wished he had thought to bring his raincoat, his flannel felt heavier than normal with the rain holding him back. He watched as the smaller man kept trying forward, trudging the thick mud up the slopes. Red just kept a silent marveling at the determination, he never saw such tenacity from a man. 

“I don’t think I can go any further.” Red tried his best to speak louder than the rain, his old body was beginning to feel the effects of walking even if it was just around the woods. Winston stopped in his tracks when hearing those words. He stood facing away thinking of the best plan, but none came to him. He just needed to find him regardless. 

“Then go back.”

“No, now don’t do this.” Red said as he tried his best to meet up with the man. The rain fell off the shorter man’s hard helmet drenching his white shirt to show skin tone through. Red could see the eyes of the man, they told him he was crying to himself as they went around the forest. “We can’t risk ourselves out here, we could get lost. Then who’d save us?” 

“Look, Red. I have to do this.” The man said turning the flashlight on as the wilderness grew darker. “Gord wouldn’t be out here if I hadn’t done what I did. I did this and I have to fix it.” Winston placed his hand on the cold wet shoulder of the older man. He watched as the lodge leader gave a heavy sigh and switched his flashlight on. 

“Okay. Okay, you lead Winston.” 

The smaller man gave a small smile and turned to look at whatever he pointed the light at, he was starting to regret going out this far at this time. “Alright…” softly he spoke as he slowly started to walk. He didn’t want to be under too tall of trees in the thunderstorm, but it was difficult when the forest was filled with them. He just wandered ahead of the older man, trying to find anything to help find him. He kicked a few small stones as he stepped until he kicked a metal object. Even Red’s ears caught the sound of a metal can as he rushed to the man. Winston had picked it up pointing the light to the label. 

“Jolly Green Giant?” he read aloud. Red snatched it from his hand and looked at it. 

“This is one of his cans. We’ve got to be getting closer…” Red began to walk to the right of the other man finding the metal pull lid. “Winston, let’s go this way!” 

The other kept his eyes open the best he could in such darkness, he thanked that the rain had slowed but the lightning continued to streak the dark followed by a close crack of the thunder. In a flash of lightning he caught something out of the corner of his eye, it was gone as fast as he saw it. He pointed his light to a large cedar, but nothing was there, Winston left the man leading to go his way. Red turned around only when he didn’t get a response from the other. Winston crept slowly up to the tree and peered around the bark.

“Gord?” he whispered seeing the huddled ball. The mint green shirt was just as soaked as his own shirt. “Gord, are you okay?” he was worried at the mass he found under the tree. The man huddled on the ground finally looked up at the light that pointed to him. There was Gord, cold from becoming stuck out in the forest in the storm. He didn’t want to make contact with Winston even if inside he wanted to hug him to be sure he wasn’t seeing things. “Red I found him!”

“We can go home now Gord. Wouldn’t that be nice?” Winston smiled as he saw the man, he was worried he’d lost. “And we can be happy again.”

“Why are we even trying? I'm broken. Years of isolation have taken a toll on me. I don't know how to keep anyone in my life." Gord burst into tears, his face turning red from the frustration and sadness. He hunkered down next to a large cedar as the flashlight pointed at the ground. Winston came to his knees dropping his light, only Red held the light. He felt this was a private movement but if he left then they'd be lost in the woods at night just as much as himself. 

"Hey, hey, hey, look at me," Winston spoke in a soft voice and outstretched his hand to touch the tear stained cheek, "I'm broken too you know. I've had years of negativity and neglect, eh. But I think we can take what broken pieces we are and be whole together."

"Wow Winston that was really nice." Red spoke quietly to himself aloud. He never really heard anyone speak in such a way, it was different from how the other men treated each other with that 'get over it you're a man' attitude. 

"Did those books you read say that?" Gord sniffed in, he hated those books at times. It took away the attention from him. He shivered from the cold as he tried to keep away from the man.

"No. I did. Me to you, Gordon. Because honestly I want you to be with me." The other man sat on the leaf covered floor and put both arms out wanting the larger man to hug him. "Please Gord, I'm sorry for how and what I said. I was just so mad at Dalton that I forgot myself." he felt this hard-lump form into his throat. Gord looked at him, those tear stained eyes much like his own. Those outstretched arms waiting for him to fill them, he started to sit up from his position and continued to think about it. The matter of the fact was never got over Winston, it just hurt more when he left. Gord lunged into those arms and wrapped his own around the smaller frame. Red changed his glances to the clouds above, he didn’t need to see too much of compassion in one day. 

“Everything hurt.” Gord cried into the neck of the other man. His usually deep voice cracked with each syllable he spoke. His chest ached from crying ragged breathes, he was distraught and relieved at once. His emotions ran high as he grabbed the man, he felt those hands grip him, rubbing gently over his back. Gord could feel the heaving of Winston as he cried along. 

“I know, I hurt you Gord. I’m so sorry.” Winston whispered into his ear as they broke their embrace. Helping each other to their feet, the ranger towered over the two men once again. A bright flash of lightning traced the trees striking a dead tree. The men all huddled closer together only to break apart from Red, they watched as the dead tree had caught in flames. Gord watched as it burned. 

“Isn’t that a fire Gord?” Red asked hoping the ranger would come to his senses.

“Fire. A fire!” it was like he woke up from his stupor.

“Call it in Ranger Gord. It's your job.” Winston spoke as he handed him his cellphone that was tucked into the inner pockets of his waders. The feeling of confidence returned to the ranger as he took the phone dialing the number.

……….

“Hey, ah, look about everything.” Dalton stood looking down at the floor of the main room of the lodge. It had been four days since finding Gord, he had gotten stuck in the forest on his return from his rounds. Winston stood with both Greens behind him, Harold had returned from his job for the weekend. “I just want to say I’m sorry. I know I acted like a buffoon.”

“More like a jackass.” Winston corrected him, gaining a small noise from Harold.

“Okay, like a jackass. And I want to say that I’m deeply and very, very sorry. Can we be friends again?”

“That’s on you Dalton. Can you stand having someone you know gay?” Winston asked the fatter man across from him. Dalton stood quiet for a moment to think.

“I think I can. I will learn to keep my mouth shut.” Dalton answered gaining a small chuckle from the smaller man. “Deal?”

“Let’s kiss on it.” Winston said, getting a pale faced Dalton give a look that showed fear. “I’m joking.” 

Dalton gave an unsure laugh as he began for the door to the basement meeting room. Red gave a gruff laugh at the fear in Dalton’s eyes as he rushed out of the room. “Did you and Gord patch things up?” He finally asked the man.

“Yeah we did. And now, I’m currently off the market. He and I are dating.” Winston flashed a genuine smile across his face. He was excited to announce it to anyone who asked.

“Congratulations.” Harold chimed in and giving a small pat to the shoulder of the septic cleaner. He gave his large toothy smile at the news.

“See Harold, if two men can date there’s hope for you yet.” His uncle gave a quip the much younger man gaining a disapproving glare from the man. Before Harold could open his mouth for a reply the squeal of the possum rang throughout the lodge. 

“Meeting time!” Winston happily exclaimed. Red allowed them to get on ahead of him, with Harold still giving glares as he descended the stairs. As Red was about to head the stairs himself the door opened. A skinner man came in wearing a black shirt and rolled jeans, his greying hair swept up and held back with spray. 

“Oh, by golly, Mike, I didn’t realize you got out today.” The older man said as he put the khaki fishing vest on with the possum emblem on the front. 

“They let me out on good behaviour.” Mike’s high voice answered back, “I missed you guys. Did I miss anything?”

Red stared at the man and gave a crooked smile on his lips, “Well Mike, it’s been big, big stuff down here at the lodge…” He spoke as he led the man to the basement for the meeting.


End file.
